Saturday, March 18, 2017

What to do when there is no peace.

     As much as I would like to spend the day in bed with my blinds and door closed, I can't.  As much as I'd like to do the same to the world, I can't.  There is no place that I can secret myself and be free from those moments, hours, or even days when peace seems to avoid contact with me from any direction.  Why is that?  I could cite my PTSD, my chronic pain, my disabling diagnoses, as well as my relationships gone wrong.  Maybe you can relate?  I hope that I'm not the only person in the world that has spells in here life that resemble what I've described.  We all know that we can have the peace of God that surpasses all understanding.  My problem begins when I take my eyes off Jesus and look instead at what's wrong.  Not that I'll ever have a moment in my life when something isn't wrong.  Rather, in the midst of that "wrong" keeping my eyes on Jesus.  When I succumb to thoughts that take me "there", I begin to get tunnel vision and can see less and less Jesus.  Sometimes I drop into a "hole" and can remain there for weeks  I'm sure that others do this as well because I know many people like me.  These times of no peace are in the valleys of our lives.  We long to get through the valley and once again attain some elevation of the mountain where peace resides.
     One day I discovered a website called PatientsLikeMe.com.  I opened the site and soon found myself wanting to belong and see what it has to offer.  When you sigh up there are a bunch of questions about your diagnoses and conditions that allows the site (you remain anonymous) to categorize you for what can be most helpful to you.  I learned that on the site there were over 22,600 people that matched my profile.  I began to enter into groups and individuals conversations and further learned there were a LOT of Christians on the site.  Why is it that Christians would be found in this site?  There were pastors, laymen and outsiders as well as those who had been victimized by the church, pastors and laymen.  As time passed I was able to help and be helped by these wounded warriors.  Prayer is powerful and so are encouraging words.  Amidst all of this there was also some confrontation.  Being called out by those who are struggling as you are is not bad.  It may be difficult to engage at first but you learn that these people really do care about you.  The church is a good place to interact about your problems.  However, there is no one like the person who has been, is currently and will continue to go through what you are going through.
     Christians tend to put on their Sunday go to meeting faces whenever they are around "church" people.  No wanting others to know the dilemma of their lives, they hide behind a smile.  Being judged by the church is horrifying!  Jesus said, "judge not lest you be judged."  Why don't we listen?  While it's true we need fellowship and all that comes with it, we need to know we are safe.  Whenever we trust man with what we should be trusting God with we run the risk of judgment.  God forgives us our sins and "remembers them no more."  Not so with the church and with Christians in general.  Forgive and forget is a lie.  Our minds don't allow us to forget.  Living out our lives in plain view is dangerous and threatens the peace that we do have.  It may sound like I'm making an argument for being a hermit.  That's not the case.  I'm making an argument for how the Christian can go about aiding people with the sole purpose of encouraging that place of peace.  There are many caring Christians who will pray without prying.  Seek them out.  There are many Christians who have your past as there's.  Seek them out.  There is no shame in bringing your lack of peace to someone you trust.  God is waiting for us as well and as you all know, it's always your choice.

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