The saying goes, "an addict alone with his/her own mind is in bad company." It's true. We don't like either thought. We don't like to believe that we are addicts nor do we like to believe we are messed up. It's true though. This journey through life isn't about everyone else, history or the future. This journey through life is about you. It's about me. It's about now, It's about the quality of life we leave for others pleasure. That doesn't mean that if you are a well educated or well traveled individual that you have left a quality of life others can find pleasure from. In the end, they will look at you and I and either see Jesus or us. If all they see is us, then we have really messed up. If they see Jesus then they have seen the only important part of life. We make the decision daily and sometimes don't even know it. There are people who watch us all the time. It may be that guy in the car beside us on the freeway, our mother-in-law, the child standing at our feet, or a friend who wants to be part of our lives. They are there and they are watching to see if it's "us" or "Jesus" whom we profess to know and serve.
Just what does my life look like? Is it the truth or is it a lie? What would you do if for 24 hours every thought you had, regardless of where and when, was spoken out loud for everyone to hear? People would hear what the don't see and see what they don't hear. What would your response be to my question? "Holy crap!" comes to my mind. If the world around me can't see Jesus in me there probably is good reason. My thoughts belie that reason. So, if then, our thoughts were out loud would we be in a state of happiness or despair? I don't have an answer for you but I would need to isolate for 24 hours! No contact with human beings of any age, race or stature for 24 hours. Still, I would be condemned by He who knows all of my thoughts...as messed up as they and I are. When we go through our day God is standing right there with us. He's riding in our cars and sitting next to us on the plane. He is there in the room with us with whomever we are dining, talking, having a meeting or other activity. Not as a voyeur but as a loving father who wants only the best for his child.
What would be your response if you were to read this blog tomorrow and all that was written was every thought I had for the previous 24 hours regardless of the nature of that thought? Would you be indignant that this writer could possibly think thus? Would you be ambivalent about the content because it's your content too? Would you feel sad for me that I have such a weird mind? Would you see Jesus? Hmm... The best choice I can make every moment of every day is to not think. Not be "myself". The best choice I can make is to follow the Bible's command that I "take every thought captive" before it takes me captive. You see, when we do the thinking our thoughts condemn us. Our thoughts control us and take us captive. We see ourselves as worthless sinner in a hopeless world where we are doomed every day we take a breath. It's true. Seldom do we really, deep down inside of our hearts and minds, do we think of ourselves as "more than conquerors" or "fighting the good fight."
So, the church then becomes nothing more (or less) than one big 12 step group where we share where we have found hope in help from God. Should our thoughts be out loud in church we would need to be on our knees praying for not only ourselves but those around us. The only choice is to claim Jesus' free gift of salvation (which we don't deserve) and to step aside in all aspects of our lives so that He is what our lives are all about. It's only in this relationship that we can say that we "no longer live, but Christ lives within us." Let Jesus think through you and you won't be messed up. Listen to His voice and get used to His thinking and not your own. Don't be messed up!
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