Adrian and I were
stationed in Germany in the US Army. We
were close friends and shared the same faith.
Adrian was very fascinating and was a unique intimate friend. One night we were praying together at the end
of our day. I had barely closed my eyes
and bowed my head before I heard Adrian praying out loud. Except it didn’t sound like prayers. That’s when I realized that Adrian was telling
God a joke! After we had prayed I asked
Adrian why he had told God a joke. He
said that he did this frequently and believed that God wanted to be part of his
intimate life. He had told God this joke
because, “God likes to laugh too!” My
friend was in an intimate relationship with Jesus. I had never heard anyone tell a joke to God
and haven’t since. Sometimes we may say
something funny but not a joke. There is
more to an intimate relationship with God than we know or understand. This is true because we are taught to pray by
parents, Sunday school teachers, grandparents and others. Affection, as we have listed, is a two-way
street. We receive affection and we give
affection. You might argue that this
isn’t true because when we give affection the offering to others is sometimes
rejected. The key in any of the parts of
our intimate relationship with God boils down to our only being able to give
away that which we receive. Even as God
exercises intimate affection with us, we accept or reject that intimacy. Should we choose to accept only a little
intimacy, we can only give away a little intimacy. You know people who accept a lot of intimacy.
In this same vein of intimate
relationship, Adrian taught me the power of greeting one another with a holy
kiss. Yes, it was in public and
completely natural for Adrian and was also natural with me. We were brothers in Christ. The Bible tells Christians to greet one
another with a holy kiss. The “holy”
kiss is again first received from God before we can give to others. Have you been kissed by God? Adrian has and so have I. It’s not that we have physically been kissed
by Jesus. That would certainly mean we
were in Heaven with him. I believe that
Jesus will greet us with a kiss when we enter into his presence. We can know what that is like before we get
there. How do you get kissed by
God? If you don’t know what to look for,
you won’t know when it happens. If you
are only looking for the kiss, you will miss it. Being Jesus to the world around us brings us
into intimacy that we have never known before.
It’s in those moments when we are least expecting the kiss that it
happens.
For me the kiss happened one night when I
was going to work at the Coffee House that Youth With A Mission ran on the military
base where I was stationed. I had been
working in the Coffee House for some time.
I was close friends with David who was the chaplain’s assistant. He was a good Christian man and was
Presbyterian by church membership. As I
came down into the Coffee House (it was in the basement of a building) I ran
into David in the doorway. He looked
terrible! He was congested, coughing and
was sweating (fever). I asked him if I
could pray for him. He said, “Right
now?” I told him yes and he said he
would like that. So, I began to
pray. It’s important to note that I
believe what the Bible says. So, I
prayed for David’s healing. As I prayed
I felt the Spirit of God surround us.
Suddenly I felt the symptoms of congestion, coughing and fever pass
through me and disappear somewhere behind me.
I finished praying and opened my eyes.
David was staring at me wide eyed.
He asked me what had happened. He
said he felt the symptoms leave his body through his hands into my hands. I told him that God had healed him. Indeed, David’s symptoms were gone. He was healed. It was the hand of God being intimate with
two men who loved him and called upon his name.
God kissed me. I’m sure David
felt the same way. God is always that
close!
You may think that this is just my
exaggeration of God’s presence. You
would be wrong. The Bible is full of men
and women who cherished their close relationship with God. They talk of their walking with God and
listening to his voice of instruction and encouragement. The first time God was intimate with me I
wasn’t even saved at the time. He’s that
kind of God. He is one “who draws
near.” October 1, 1972, I was on guard
duty in a tower overseeing an ammunition bunker. I was armed with a loaded .45 caliber
pistol. My life had been downward
spiraling for some time after the death of a close friend. Drugs and alcohol wasn’t killing the hurt for
me anymore. I had no one to talk with
and had begun isolating myself from others.
Finally, I had come to the decision to kill myself. Life wasn’t life at all. So, I went on guard duty that night to
complete the task. Something told me to
ask if there was a god. So, I did. The guard tower was filled with a warmth and
I felt a hand on my left shoulder. There
was no one there with me and my eyes were open.
I knew in that instant that God had visited me. As I bowed my head I felt his love wash over
me. I left guard duty a different man. I
had been kissed by God.
That night God had shown his affection
towards me. That night he had heard my
hearts cry and answered. That night he
heard my confession and forgiven me my sins.
That night God chose through the work of Jesus to remember my sins no
more. It took me a long time to wrap my
head around this new me. Since that
night, I have had many wonderful times with Jesus in prayer and service. I’ve also chosen to sin many times. Sometimes I turned my back on God for months
or years at a time. What I quickly
learned was that God was right beside me every moment during that time. Just like he was when I was walking with
him. Though I have been away from God,
he has never been away from me. Jesus
knows me intimately. He knows what I
will do or say before it’s even conceived in my brain. He sends his angels to guard me from
evil. Who on earth would do that for
me? Who on earth would do that for
you? They may be able to put up with me
when I’m in a good space but how about when I’m in a bad space?
When we walk away from God, we are
feigning affection. We are pushing away
His love for us. When we do this as
Christians we are not only doing it to God but also to his people. Why is this so bad? This putting off love severs intimacy with
God. If you do this with God’s people
you sever that intimacy. Should you do
that with a spouse, again you sever the intimacy. No one can be intimate with himself or
herself. It is our sin that separates us
from the love of God. We are asked to
“especially” not feign affection. Why
the specific language. The writer of the
Desiderata asks that we especially not damage or put off intimate
affection. There are many other ways of
putting off affection that are not so direct.
For instance, when you don’t make time for someone, you feign affection
and deny the God the moment to bless you through another person. Sometimes we tell ourselves that we won’t
take the help of another person. Have
you ever been invited to dinner/movie/church and refused? Unless there is a good reason, you are
feigning affection. You can live your
life with your plans and have less than God wishes for you. But why would you do that?
Remember that when you came to Christ
your sins were erased and are remembered no more by God. In our minds it’s quite another thing. Satan loves to taunt us with thoughts of our
past hoping to take us off track and pull away from Jesus. If he can’t get to you directly he will use
family, friends, co-workers, and anyone else he can find. The motive is to create a wedge between you
and God. God remembers none of our
wrongs when we have asked for forgiveness and repented. He would like us to not remember our wrongs
also. Furthermore, God wants us to
forget the wrongs of those around us.
When we stay within the love of God, we are more able to go through life
in His power. When we are attacked by
spiritual forces or human ones with a weakened relationship with God, we
succumb to the world around us.
Remember, God is never far away.
One step of prayer will bring us back into that right relationship and
return us to peace.
I would be remiss if I didn’t take time
to address how we humans have and do use affection to manipulate others. We try to manipulate God but can never
succeed. So, we turn to others to
manipulate. We sinners (you know who you
are) do not like to be caught sinning alone.
What we do is bring in a comrade, friend, spouse, co-worker, or some
other person. The process is quite
subtle and doesn’t go as fast as I write.
Our memories are our most dreaded enemy.
The mind remembers everything even if you don’t. Those around us remember our past as
well. Our enemies (some are our closest
friends and family) smell the blood and go for the throat. It’s hard to build; much less maintain affection
between them and us. Memories are
supposed to work as reminders of what we are to do and what we are not to
do. Memories are for keeping us thankful
for the blessings of God. For some, the
constant barrage of reminders of all we have done wrong their eyes keeps us
captive. Perhaps you have people in your life who won’t let you forget the bad
and try to ignore the good. God is
gracious. Mankind is not.
While visiting with my oldest friend and
sister, Charlotte, we talked, as we often did, of the history of our
family. We have our stories we like to
tell and retell. Sometimes we come upon
a story (either she or me) that the other one doesn’t remember. It’s not that we have forgotten the
story. It’s that we remember other
stories more. Our mind categorizes our
memories and brings them to us when we want or need them. So, it is with those who are less or more
involved in our lives. We both have
perspectives that differ and have agreed to disagree where we don’t want to
give in. It’s a healthy relationship and
one where we laugh regularly. While some
issues move through our minds that are negative we ignore them and stay
focused. Conversely, we keep the
memories right up front that we appreciate or enjoy. We choose to not keep a record of wrongs. I know, and you do too, quite a few people
who live in the past and only in the negative part of the past. They keep track of wrongs and categorize them
according to intensity so that the wrong may be used to manipulate or injure
later. During Jesus’ ministry of 3 years
there is little said about the disciples past mistakes. There was very little about their present
mistakes. Peter, Judas and Thomas were
the ones who had their weakness and sin pointed out. Jesus didn’t “lord” it over them. Charlotte and I don’t “lord” over each
other. There is no reason, point, or
constructive resolve that comes from that.
I have kept records of wrongs. I’m not proud of this but it’s the
truth. I have kept records of the wrongs
I have committed as well as those who have committed the wrong to me. I don’t do much of that anymore. The division
between keeping a record of wrongs and being wise in our choices once burned is
huge. God, in His Word, tells us to be
angry and sin not. That is a lot easier
said than done. It’s hard because we
need to get out of the way of God. When
I contemplate a wrong, do I do so with the Spirit within me or do I do it by my
own spirit? We should always seek to see
our world from God’s eyes. With his
vision we are less prone to go about life keeping records of wrongs. I’d like to share with you a definition that
I discovered a long time ago.
“Forgiveness has taken place when what you remember does not bother you
anymore.” In a journal I wrote that
sentence. I stopped and was shocked to
see what was written as it carried much truth.
I began to look over the memories and the lists in my mind and
addressing them, so they bothered me no more.
I’m still working on it. Lack of
forgiveness is not good. Remember the
Lord’s Prayer? “Forgive us our sins as
we forgive those who have sinned against us.”
It’s like a chicken bone getting caught in your throat. Where we would freely accept God’s
forgiveness for our sins and erase his memory; we do not do so with those who
have sinned against us. If we had
forgiven them, if we had let them off the hook, if we remembered their sins no
more; we would not have any record of wrong done to us. You want to be free of the sin of remembering
wrongs of others? Forgive them. Yes, it’s that simple. Take the time to go through your memories and
forgive those who you haven’t forgiven.
You can even forgive someone who has passed away. Perhaps it might be beneficial for you to
compare their list to the one you have kept for yourself.
I’d like to point out one more
observation about forgiveness in the Lord’s Prayer. There is NO mention of others needing to come
for us for forgiveness for us to forgive them.
Did you catch that? Our forgiving
others is not dependent upon or contingent upon forgiving them. It’s not a choice. We are not responsible for correcting them,
for discipline of them or passing of judgment.
Remember that we shall be “judged as you have judged others.” I don’t want that. So, our judgment of others is paramount to
our maintaining and growing affection between our fellow men and women (regardless
whether they love God or not.) With our
keeping no record of wrong the boulder of separation between us will dissolve
and intimacy of friends and fellow believers is possible. To put it simply, first confess your own sins
and seek God’s forgiveness. Next,
forgive others and get rid of the lists you have. Third, let no barrier come between you and
those around you. Fourth, with this new
environment, talk with your brothers and sisters about Jesus. Remember your first love! The love that God showered upon you while you
were yet sinning.
What do we do with those who continue to
sin against us? Let them. They cannot take that which we have received
away from us. If what we have, the love
of God, the only way that love becomes ineffective is when we choose to not
acknowledge the love and choose to stop loving as God has shown towards
us. We are told in Revelations as well
as through some of the Old Testament prophets that there will be those who revolt
against the Christian and bring all kinds of accusations upon the
Christian. This will include, for some,
their own blood relatives and even their children and/or spouse. In the end, betrayal will be rampant on the
earth with much martyrdom of believers.
There have been millions of Christians who have been killed because of
their faith within the world the last decade or two. Denominations have become perverted allowing
that which the Bible forbids.
Encouraging the acceptance of sin instead of holiness has only hastened
the return of the Lord. When he comes
back, what will he find? Will he find
the “Christian” church ready or wrong?
What would those people and companies on
your wrongs list think if you forgave them?
No, I’m not asking you to do so.
What would happen if you let them out of jail? Here is a hint: they would feel the same way you do when you
have asked for forgiveness from God.
What would happen if they noticed a major change in your attitude and
behavior towards them? Here is another
hint: they would feel the same way as when those around you relaxed and opened
to you. You see, it’s all in our
choice. It’s not in their choice. They don’t need to go first for us to
initiate forgiveness AND they don’t need to go first for us to hold out our
hand and offer Jesus to those around us.
Now, what do you think would happen to the community if the church first
did this to those around them? No hint
here. You know what would happen. What if the Christian church REALLY lived the
Christian faith? Perhaps others would
want to be like us. Perhaps they would
want to be like you. Perhaps that would
turn into their wanting to be like Jesus.
That’s the point, isn’t it?
It’s important that we do not feign
affection. You know that now if you
didn’t know that before. When we embrace
the love of God and show forth his affection which is within us, the world
around us will know. When we do not keep
any records of wrongs the world can be changed.
Don’t be a part of that which tears the Christian and Christian witness
apart. Do be a part of sharing the love
of God anyway he asks.
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