When it comes to like
“always” and “never” I’m reminded that the only absolute words are “death and
taxes”. However, for this sentence and
Scripture I’ll make the exception. This
chapter is going to deal with who we think we are and how that relates to our
past, present and future. It’s important
that we keep fastened in our mind the process of sanctification we are going
through. This process is only complete
when we pass from here to Heaven. We
won’t discuss taxes! How does
“self-control” interact with our sanctification? What part does it play in the discovery of
who God wants us to be? When is it healthy
to think of yourself and when is it necessary to humble yourself before
God? I have a hard time with the latter
of the two and sometimes the first part as well. There are so many years of input that weren’t
healthy nor were they humbling. As a
result, the desire within me was almost always governed by comparison of myself
with those whom I perceived as greater or lesser than myself. The comparison of ourselves with others is
not necessarily good nor bad. We are
encouraged to compare where we are to where God wants us to be. Should we exercise self-control directed by
the Holy Spirit, the only comparison is the one where, side by side, we see who
we are versus how God sees us. So, we
come to the question of how does God see us?
What do we present to Him? Does
our walk match our words? And so, let’s
keep in mind that we need to daily surrender to Him and repent of our sin. It’s only in so doing that we can become more
like Jesus. That is the point of our
life in Christ. The world’s standard is
who you are by the world’s standard. The
world has lowered the bar and confused the expectations to the point of
insanity.
Self-control is a delicate word and has
an impact on each of us. As we have seen
throughout the Bible and especially in the Old Testament there are many Godly
people who have been called to be prophets and teachers. These people were called to present God’s
message to his people in a way characterized by the world as out of control. Yet, in God’s eyes there was total
self-control. Why? Because God is the perfect example of balance
in all ways. His love constrains his
intervention in people’s lives and at the same time compels the crucifixion of
his Son for our ransom. Both displays
are of God’s self-control at work.
Within the world we live in self-control is seen quite differently. Self-control for a 16-year-old boy or girl is
very different than that of their parent.
The self-control of the parent is much different from that of their
child. This example has lots of
applications to include; work, play, meetings, gatherings, church, and many
more. Suffice it to say, self-control
permeates our lives. All of us, me
especially, have a need for self-control and a weak will to carry out
self-control. One of the areas of little
self-control in my life is my weight control.
The consequences of which impact my wife, family and friends. With just that one example I’ve succeeded in
soliciting so many of your “amen brother” resulting in our awareness and most
likely shame. I know it does for
me.
The Disearata begins with “for
always”. It’s important that we remember
what fruits of the spirit we have already looked at. These will come into play in how we interpret
God’s will in our lives. Mankind’s
purpose, according to Scripture, is to bring honor and glory to God. When we are in the habit of comparing
ourselves to others; we step outside the place where God wishes us to be. When we read, for always, what we mean is at
our pleasure. We will compare when it is
to our advantage. We are/are not like,
him, her, them, the boss, and on we go.
Which choice suits our purpose?
Therein lies the problem; we are not to be focused on “our”
purpose. We are to be focused on God’s
purpose. But then I repeat myself.
How many of us have, as children, heard
the “(s) he’s looks just like his/her mom/dad”.
“When they do ______, it’s so cute!”
“He has his father’s anger” “She carries grudges just like
grandma.” “Well! He says one thing, but he sure shows the
opposite.” “You know she got that from
her father.” “Why can they behave in
school when they can’t at home?” We
begin to get the view that this comparison not only exists in everyone’s life
but also permeates our lives on multiple levels. While much of the comparison can be positive,
there are also the dangers of putting comparison in negative view. As believers we wrestle daily with who we are
in Christ. We may not call it as such. But that is what we are doing. There are expectations put on the believer
that Jesus calls his “light” burden. I
call it impossible! It seems that I am
always in conflict within myself over who I am versus who God wants me to
be. I’ve conclude that this is a forever
journey. Perhaps it is for you
also. There are so many who strive to be
good Christians. They should be
applauded for the discipline that keeps their focus on Jesus. After all, our lives should be only all about
Jesus.
To be blunt, we don’t like to face the
truth about ourselves. We need to have
those less than us so that we can feel good about our successes. We need those who are greater than us to feel
good about our humbleness. Okay, which
is it? Neither. We need neither of the choices for always
there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. It is here, at this point, that we see the
need for the spiritual fruit of “self-control” and how it interacts with our
life. We, all people, live in this
conflict and controversial (at least internally) person we know ourselves to be
and who we should be. It’s no wonder so
many people in the world are depressed.
Knowing the truth is supposed to set you free. However, it is not “our” truth that sets us
free. It is God’s truth that sets us
free. Are we willing to look at God’s
truth? You do know that it is our
choice. We can choose whether we look at
and engage His truth or not. The truth
may set us free but it is not license to choose whose truth is right, proper
and fitting within our lives.
What is it that God wants us to do with
His image in our lives? Does he have
this never-ending game of “not good enough”?
We use comparison as control and manipulation as a tool to “win the
game” (one in which no one wins). In our
version of “not good enough” (there ought to be a table game) we soundly defeat
others for us to “win”. We lose and so
does everyone else. God doesn’t play
this game. God has simple rules for
living: 1. Love God. 2. Love each other. We are to love God and others with the love
he has given us. The love God gives us
is not comparative. There is no
“greater” or “lesser” in the definition.
John 3:16 says “For God so loved the world…” That means everyone the same. If you can imagine it, this is like a process
in a factory where there are different shaped bottles all with the same color
of caps. The “definition and
application” of the caps is applied to all equally. You don’t get a blue one while your sister
gets a pink one. We are all complex
individuals whom God knows intimately because He crated us. He not only wrote our script, but he breathed
the breath of life into us. Psalm 148
says that he knew us before we were in our mother’s womb. Wow!
Why do we expect from others based on our understanding? Why do others expect from us according to
their understanding? THIS is the
problem. We are using the wrong
understanding and expecting the same result.
That is what creates division among the body of Christ. The rest of the world is in much worse shape. Should we all find ourselves in the position
of only doing God’s will the Christian and the army of Christians would be a
formidable force empowered by His likeness and not destroyed their
likeness. It’s all about Jesus, not
me.
So, in God’s view there is no lesser nor
greater human being in all his creation.
We have invented that mindset.
Satan introduced the situation in the garden, but we took the initiative
to plant the sin in our lives. And so,
we find ourselves in this quagmire of image versus reality. Just how does self-control play out in your
life? How does it play out in my life? Self-control only plays out when we give
self-control up to God. Exercising His
self-control takes the burden off us and kills the need to compare. This may be a new thought for some of
you. It may even be a radical
though. However, stepping out of the
world’s game is essential for the Christian whether they be new in the faith or
an old saint. This isn’t our game. This is His life and it’s no game. This holds the balance for mankind’s
salvation in a very important drama unfolding with us without you. Do not be deceived, God is in control and His
will plan has already succeeded. Mankind
has been redeemed by the death and resurrection of Jesus for all of mankind’s
sin. It’s just sad to see so many go
through their life not knowing what they are missing.
That’s where you and I come in. We are the ones who can be present in other
people’s lives and give them a glimpse of the Gospel just by how we live. We’ve been given the example by Jesus, words
by Jesus, and life by Jesus. What are
you going to do with what you know?
Well, exercising self-control is as good a starting point as any. Self-control is a bit of a misnomer. The only control we need to take as a
Christian is to give up the control to Jesus on a daily, hourly and sometime
minute by minute basis. It’s a difficult
discipline if you try to do it on your own.
It is much easier if you allow Jesus to do the hard stuff for you. Here are just a few areas of Jesus would like
us to exercise his control.
Gossip
is a good place to start. When we gossip
we grieve the Holy Spirit and sin? The
gossip is always damaging. If it isn’t
damaging it may not be gossip. Allow
Jesus to be the plumb line on what gossip is and what is not. Follow His example of how he entertained
gossip. He didn’t gossip and prayed for
those who did. We have all kinds of back
doors where we go to gossip and say it’s okay.
“We need to pray for Steve because I saw him in a bar.” Loud gasp please…. “Did you hear...?” “Can you believe…?” “Well, I think the pastor just needs to hear
from some of the older saints in the church to see that he is wrong.” Okay, enough of the excuses. Gossip is never okay. When was the last time you heard someone
asking you to go with you to talk with Steve about Jesus? When was it you stopped someone from
gossiping to you or in front of you?
When was the last time you took out your written list of prayer requests
and added items rather than gossip about them?
The Navy has a saying for this: “Loose lips sink ships.” If your tongue is loose and you are gossiping,
you are hurting someone…yourself at least.
Sin separates us from the relationship we can have with Jesus. It’s not that we lose our salvation as much
as it is about stepping away from God’s presence in our life.
Another
area we could surrender to God and find our lives altered is our thoughts. Yes, I know that people cannot see our
thoughts. God can though, and he wants
them centered on that which is good and glorifies the Lord we serve. What are our minds filled with? I don’t know about anyone but myself. My thoughts are in control if I don’t hand
them over to God. That is not good at
all. The worldly mindset again separates
us from the blessings of God. Do an
inventory on paper. As you go through
either an hour or longer write down everything you have thought about. In the quiet of your home the list will be
one thing. In the presence of your
family the list will alter. Out in the
mall or in a questionable place of business the list suddenly explodes. In church our minds are to be on Jesus and,
yet our minds wander where don’t want them to.
One of the specific areas God would like to see us delivered from is
those thoughts that distract us from Him.
Worry, anger, confusion, mediocrity, and fear all come to mind. Yes, I have done all of them in church. So, have many of you. God wants us to focus on Him.
What
to do? Imagine a world where all our
thoughts were immediately out loud to everyone who is around us. Kind of scary to me. That is the scenario when we have Jesus in
our lives. All our thoughts are out loud
to him in his presence. Ouch! It’s not that God doesn’t understand us. He created us and knows us intimately. He’s not some big brother waiting for the
perfect moment to squash you. He wants
the best for us and we are unable to deliver that best even with our best
efforts. So, God sent the Holy Spirit to
prod us on, yank our chain when we are out of line and to show us what life can
be like as surrendered under God control.
What would happen if you and a spouse/friend/pastor were to be
accountable to each other with ALL your thoughts? Would accountability help? Only if you were serious and honest.
That
is where we come to the only way to have self-control. The only “self” that we can control needs to
be given over to Christ. No ifs, ands,
or buts about it. This is our challenge
and our blessing. What would our
children and children’s children be like if they saw us under God’s control in
all areas of our lives? What would we
see? So, what are we going to do? The Bible says we are held accountable for
all that we know. It further says that
if we do that which we know is not right to do; we sin. Don’t sin.
“Go placidly amid the noise and haste and
remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all
persons. Speak your truth quietly and
clearly and listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they too have their
story. Avoid loud and aggressive
persons, they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for
always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.”
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