While there are instances in everyone’s life of misadventure, there is more than enough evidence of good to keep us hopeful. There are many phrases that describe our mindset. How about: "that’s the straw that broke the camel’s back." for starters. I personally don’t know how many straws it takes to reach the breaking point. Judging from the camels I have seen breaking their backs with straw would be a huge undertaking. We don’t really mean the literalness of a word or phrase. What we want to convey is how much we have already gone through and yet we survive. Scripture tells us that God will not put anything on us that we cannot bear or carry. I guess that means straw as well. Over the decades man has been able to move from simple speech and definition to a more complex place with language and its meaning. The acts or actions remain the same but what was once the definition of a word has changed to encompass changes with mankind. Being able to explain yourself and to understand others, the makers of dictionaries have added words to the bounty we already have. Their meaning, they feel, is essential to mankind. However we address the issue, misfortune is still misfortune. Your misfortune may be greater than mine and vice versa. The issue then is not what the misfortune is but rather what we do to address the misfortune. We also need to notice that the misfortune described above is "sudden." There are all kinds of misfortune and they range from possibly never happening to the "sudden" death of your spouse at 49. To understand this suddenness of misfortune in our life it would do us good to remember our training and upbringing. Some people panic while others seem oblivious to the situation. Peter makes that point well when he is in the boat in a storm and Jesus is sleeping. Peter wakes him and basically tells Jesus that he must not care if they are in eminent peril and may lose their lives. On the opposite extreme is that old story of Chicken Little. Crying, "The sky is falling! The sky is falling!" leaves us with a dulled response mechanism.
Cultures react differently to sudden misfortune because of their belief system, coping mechanisms and preparation. For the Christian misfortune is a reflection of where our hearts are. Should we be right with God, when our possessions are taken in a flood; we will not be devastated. Why? Because they are just "things" and are not as important as life. If everyone is safe then the losses can be borne. Our hierarchy of needs places life before everything we could possess physically. "Things" can be replaced. Sometimes with even better things. People from different areas of the United States react differently because of the hierarchy of needs for their area. Not too long ago hurricane Katrina devastated the New Orleans area of the country. People fled the area with most never returning. Everything was lost but the people were resilient to the degree needed to begin again. Shortly before that tragedy, Fargo and Grand Forks, North Dakota and Minnesota were deluged with water when the spring thaw came. The businesses and homes were under water along with possessions now lost. Here is the difference between the two groups. In New Orleans and the surrounding area there was a belief that someone should be their champion and make all that was wrong right. When that did not happen, they went on with their lives wherever they were. In North Dakota and Minnesota people didn’t leave the area. They stayed close by, worked to stop the water, and when everything was over with, they rebuilt. They took it upon themselves to bring back the cities, residences and businesses. Within a short time a stranger passing through would not know the disaster had every happened. Much of New Orleans remains vacant land. Houses are not rebuilt. Businesses have not returned. So much difference in the same country just over a 1000 miles apart.
I’m not suggesting that up north the people have a better and deeper relationship with God. Nor am I suggesting that the people down south have any less ability to recover from sudden misfortune. Here are two groups of people who have been raised with different beliefs and expectations. The choice to take action or not take action has been made long before the disaster took place. For one the misfortune had already been dealt with by years of preparation and execution of whatever it would take to go on with life. For the other misfortune had already been dealt with by years of reliance on others to make right what was wrong in their lives. Big difference. This is no different than what mankind has been through since the beginning of time. These two opposite ways of treating misfortune will continue to go on for many generations to come or until Jesus come back. Asking ourselves which group we belong to is important. Are we mobilized or immobilized in our lives? Are we motivated or unmotivated when something needs to be done? Are we believing that God will take us through or do we believe that God isn’t in the business of rescuing?
Strength of spirit is embedded in the very center of our soul initially by God. Contrary to what many believe, this action on Gods part takes place before we were even conceived. Make no doubt about it, the spirit is in us prior to any of our firsts. Then we are conceived and during the pregnancy subject to any of a number of negatives in the environment inside and outside the womb. Researchers have determined that problems involving children can have their beginning in the womb. In our society of throw away children (abortion) we trivialize the spirit of God at work and in that little baby. It takes strength of spirit for us to brave the world of parenthood. And tragically, some who have strength of spirit have to say goodbye to their baby either before the birth or after the birth. Unfortunately, I have had to be in that space twice. It was only the strength of the Spirit of God that brought me through these times. From the time we become Christian the nurturing of the spirit should be a daily activity. For those of you who are hard headed as I am, this may be a real challenge. Allowing the nurturing is very essential to your life. Out of the nurturing comes a means to shield you in sudden misfortune. Notice that it doesn’t say "should" or any hopeful language. It says "in" and that means when it happens to you and not if it will happen. When misfortune happens we have two choices in our response. The first choice would be to allow God directly and through others to help reconstruct your life and the lives of those who you call dear. This would be the church coming to your side and carrying your burden when you are unable. Would your church do that for you? Sadly, all too many churches in America aren’t in the business of helping the wounded among us heal. The other choice would be to abandon the path, life, dream and try and find someone to make everything better for you. This second path results in no growth, less faith, and potential disastrous relationship problems as ramifications tumble down hill to the third and fourth generations. At least that’s what the Bible says. What do you say? In which choice do you find yourself when life is tough and misfortune comes?
The Bible says to us parents and the church of God that we should "train up a child in the way they should go and they (the child) will not depart from it." What does that mean to us? I think it’s very clear but we can unpack the truth here anyway. I’m sure many of you have been to baby dedications and baptisms. Most of the ones I have ministered over and attended have one element that is forgotten the moment the family exits the church door. The challenge is given to the parents, god parents and the congregation to train up the child to know Christ at an early age and help that child to develop a deep faith in Jesus Christ. Some people may pray for the child from time to time. You may even see a church member taking a special interest in your child during Sunday school or other church function. However, the great majority of Christians (I use the term loosely) simply go their own way and do nothing. By the way, that’s a sin. If we know what is right to do and fail to do it, we sin. Pretty plain in my mind. Unfortunately, churches and denominations are cultivating an environment more pleasing to Satan than to God. Gee Steve, why don’t you just say it like it is?! I am very aware this is a big accusation. If there were no evidence, I wouldn’t say it. We are living in a world that is (wrongly) looking for someone else to do this and that. We can be on the periphery looking in but please don’t ask us to do anything. If you are in this crowd look at your own upbringing. If you came to Jesus as an adult and find yourself here, look at the church you are attending and what they have done to help you secure your faith. The only reason I can even write these words is because God is gracious and has forgiven me when I have failed at this task. You can too. But then you know that. ‘Will you?" is the more appropriate question.
In my first book, "While I Was Yet Sinning," I explore many different lessons of life that I have gone through or someone I know has gone through. There were times in my life when there was no one there for me except God. God was enough. It still would have been advantageous to have found a brother or sister in Christ to stand with me. Ecclesiastics 3 tells us that a cord of three strands is not easily broken. So, God, you and I make a strong rope. What does it take for us to come alongside someone and nurture their spirit to a place where they can walk through the valley of death and come to the mountain top on the other side? I have been honored by my children as they asked at a young age for me to pray with them so that they could accept Christ as their Savior. Some of my children have come to Christ by other means. What matters is that they know Jesus. The rest will come as time passes by. In this current age our kids are numbed to so much of society. Third graders smoking marijuana, bringing guns to school, bullying and abusing others. Where are the nurturers? Where were they trained up that they feel these behaviors and others are okay? Our juvenile detention centers are full all across the county. Our courts are crowed with cases against parents who have abused. Where are the churches? Where are you? Where am I? When Jesus returns what will he find in you, in me, and in the church that he will be able to say, "Well done good and faithful servant."? This is an emergency! Our emergency! What are we doing? What is our motivation for doing? If our motive is from anywhere other than our heart it’s not going to fix anything. Only God can work in the heart of man. The problem in our society is that people have a dulled conscience and feel what they are doing and not doing is just fine. Maybe that is the straw that broke the camel’s back! All that evil needs to succeed is for Godly men and women to do nothing.
There will be misfortune in our lives. There will be many failures as we will have to address in our lives and the lives of our loved ones. There will be times when our faith is strong and we are able to be there to nurture others. There will be times when our faith is weak and we, hopefully, will have someone there to nurture us. If we do it right we will be raising little nurturers for future generations. What does all of this mean to us today? Right now? At this very moment? With whomever? It means we have a big thing called "hope" in our lives. Love is always hopeful. Why is love always hopeful? Because it’s from God.
Whenever I need some nostalgia my memory goes back to when my kids were little. When my older two were little they really loved each other. The day came when Jeremy was being bullied in the church parking lot. Sara went over to the boy, picked him up and threw him in the bushes! Of course I wasn’t there to see this event. Her love for and protection of her brother was immense! I know that both of them will put themselves in harm’s way to protect the ones they love from whatever happens. I have never thrown anyone into the bushes but do know that we nurtured Sara and Jeremy to look out for each other. Nurturing begins with me. Nurturing begins with you. Even when we are put in the place of dealing out consequences our children should know that we love them. If we didn’t give out the consequences we would only serve to agree that there is no need to nurture the strength of their spirit. All it takes for evil to triumph is for good men (and women) to do nothing. I know you are overloaded. I know you have no spare time. I know you take your kids to a sitter so that you can work. I know that it seems like there is no time after work and before bedtime to do much of anything. It’s not the quantity of time but rather the quality of time. Don’t make excuses for not nurturing others. Just nurture others. Jeremy and Sara are grown adults now with lives of their own. We nurture each other now. I’m sure it will continue and we will be able to move through sudden misfortune together. Regardless whose loss it is, we all share the misfortune. It’s what Christians do. People will come and go in your life as well. Sometimes they go because God has told them to go. Sometimes they go because of work or school changes. Sometimes you go for the very same reasons. Healthy nurturing will enable our children, friends and family to go with a blessing instead of a guilty conscious. Take a look at your friends, family and children. Are they able to nurture you? The love God puts in us is the motivation we need to love others and to be loved back. It’s this love that lends itself to our having a hope in times of misfortune. So, what shall we do? I would suggest that we do not resist. As they say on outer space shows, "Resistance is futile." When we resist the impulse to nurture others, we tell them that we don’t love them or need them to love us. Not a good message. We have the means through God and the example through God to practice what God does and nurture others. His hope is that we will put ourselves aside and nurture others. In the process He meets our needs. Isn’t that great?!
So, what’s the point? There are several. First, the message is that it is through God’s nurturing that we gain strength of spirit which will act as a buffer zone when misfortunes suddenly come upon us. It is the nurturing that we receive that develops a hopeful attitude and presence within us. We, sinful people that we are, resist God’s nurturing because that’s what sinful people do. We, once in proper relationship with God, are nurtured which allows us the training to nurture others. Beginning with our children and the children within our circle of influence we are the ones who instill morals and priorities within our children. As they grow physically the means to nurture changes. Our "job" is to help others see their need for Jesus, nurture them as they grow in Christ, and to hear "well done thou good and faithful servant." when we enter into heaven. Our children and the children of other Christians depend upon Christian adults to teach them and lead them in the way.
This principle does not work in reverse. Largely because life isn’t reversed. Today is the gift that yesterday was and the anticipation of the gift tomorrow will be. Movement in life is from conception to life in Christ, to going home to Heaven. There is NO age at which we should think we no longer need nurturing. Nor is there any age where we should suggest that nurturing is someone else’s job.
Here is the big picture. Should we decide to live for Christ we should be sold-out. As Paul says, "It is no longer I who live but Christ who lives within me." Take some time to read the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew chapters 5-7. When we give our whole life, we will seek to do only His will. While focusing on His will, He will take care of all of our needs. This frees us up to nurture others. We don’t need to be distracted by worrying about whether God is doing his job or not. He is faithful. He said he would. We may be shocked by his means of blessing us but we won’t be disappointed when he does bless us. We don’t need to have the cares of this world because this world isn’t our home. Our focus can be on bringing people to Jesus and then nurturing them as they grow in their relationship with Jesus. It’s not that complex and not that difficult. We make it that way. Do what you know needs to be done.
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