All too often we judge
our life with comparison to the lives of those around us. It doesn’t matter that we are all individuals
and live life within our own merit. What
has mattered to us is that we have someone in our life who is worse off than we
are. The degree of where our life is defining
how many lesser people we have in our lives.
This is a continual inner war that when won leaves us with an empty
victory. For those we had thought we
were in competition with simply were living their lives and hadn’t known of the
battle with us. There are any number of
ways we compare ourselves with others.
We will explore those different ways and assay what would be better
choices and more productive choices.
This is especially necessary in regard to the spiritual aspect of our
lives. This issue of who we are is
closely tied to our faithfulness to God.
However, we will also look at how our personal faithfulness defines our
life and impacts the lives of those around us.
Many of you may have been raised in a
small town like I was. I lived on a farm
outside of town which further distanced me from the town folk. Living in a small community is very much like
a goldfish in its bowl of water.
Microscopic inspection of your family is all part of the community. For those who were born and raised in the
small community the family heritage was very important. There were the families who paraded their
pedigree for all to see and hear about.
Don’t believe me? Pick up a
newspaper from a small community. My
town was 300 people counting dogs and cats.
I need to back up and set the stage properly. My first remembrance of where I lived was in
an even smaller community. The community
included a one room country school house.
We had neighbors who we could count on and they likewise could count on
us. You could say we were faithful to
each other. The farm we lived on was too
small to support the 9 of us. That’s 7
kids and two parents. When my parents
chose to move from that farming community I was in the middle of my 3rd
grade year at school. I had two girls in
my class with me. So many children left
the country school when we moved that they had to close it down and bus the
other kids into town. We had been
settled in the community. We were a
fixture. If you were to go back to that
community today and talked to some of the old timers, they would point out
where the Hawley’s lived.
Over the weekend I went from 3 people in
my class to 32. The bus that picked us
up carried more than twice the number of kids that went to the country
school. The learning curve was
incredible. The people from this new
community made it very clear that we didn’t belong and that we were outsiders
to their closed community. You would
have thought with 7 churches in the town that there would have been more grace
shown. The kids in the public school
were way ahead of us academically. I
don’t think we met any adults other than teachers and bus drivers for years. We got the message that we didn’t belong and
would never belong. We and other
families like us did serve a purpose to the rest of the community. When people needed lesser people to compare
themselves to they picked us. And so, at
the ripe old age of 9 and almost 10 I learned that I could not expect to get a
fair shake in the community to whom I was designated lesser than.
Now, I know very well, and so do you,
that this is repeated in large cities, small or large churches and small or
large businesses. This is happening as
much or more today than it was some 51 years ago. Whether we like it or not we are a society
that likes to feel good about itself. In
so doing the necessary casualties come and go.
Life has a way of evening the playing field. So many have gone from rags to riches and
vice versa. So many thought better of
themselves and fell hard off their pedestal amidst this or that scandal,
arrest, divorce, accusation. Many others
have walked up the chain and found the exercise more like the Klingon Empire
where you kill off the person above you and take their place. It’s a wicked world out there. When we move to the non-Christian world it
gets even worse. See, you thought I was
talking about “them” and all along I was setting the stage to talk about
“us”. A short read in any of the books
of the Bible will illustrate this phenomena’s repetition since the beginning of
time. It’s been said that the Christian
army is the only army in the world that shoots their wounded. Let’s see if that is true.
Our comparison of ourselves can be either
positive or negative. That element we
use to compare (baseline) isn’t very reliable as people, places and you
change. We are a people who grow,
mature, and end up examples to our younger counterparts. That example is built by, guess what,
comparisons. We look towards the
“perfect” athlete, singer, farmer, cowboy, teacher, writer, and so on. When we compare ourselves or others with
something we perceive as “perfect”, we set the standard and hold that out for
others around us. Should they fall
short, shame on them. Should they meet
the expectation; we raise the bar. When
we do this as adults and business professionals and other relationships, we
have not just comparison but also competition.
Since we are adults we can face the bad news. We are teaching these ways to our children,
grandchildren, nieces, nephews and neighborhood children as well. If you do not concur, look at the local kid’s
sports and their teams. Look at a
swimming tournament or baseball game.
Comparative parents almost always have the bar too high for the
child. They really are competitive
parents living out their lives through their children. And most of the kids do not like it. In the end we will need to ask ourselves and
each other if we were being faithful to God’s plan or were we being the god of
our own little (or large) world. Jesus
encourages us to be discerning with whom we associate and from whom we receive
praise or correction. Why does he do
this? Jesus knows us intimately. He is always aware of the state of our
heart. He knows when we are walking with
him and when we are not. When Jesus
spoke of comparing, the subject was relegated to being what God wants us to
be. No more and no less.
The Bible tells us parents to raise up
our children in the fear of the Lord. We
are warned to not exacerbate our children and to be patient with them. We are to instruct them in the way of the
Lord so that at an early age they may choose Jesus as their Savior. What model do your children, nieces, nephews,
grandchildren and great grandchildren see?
Do we really want them to be like us?
I don’t know about you, but I would rather my kids and grandkids not
repeat my life. So, what do we do? First and foremost, we are called to be
Christ like in our own lives. When we,
as individuals, families and churches look at being Christ like the need for
comparison to others is a moot point.
What keeps us focused is our faithfulness to Christ? Should we be faithful in our relationship to God
(the only god any Christian should have in their lives) and put his will in our
lives than we will be the adult example that he desires. This role model then can aid our younger
generations to look to Jesus and not us.
Remember, it’s all about Jesus.
Jesus knows what working with us is like. Remember that he worked with a group of 12
men who represented the spectrum of mankind.
His focus for them was to be changed men who would represent God to the
world. This was not some cult leader
that is not trusted. Jesus, God himself,
modeled what their lives should be like.
Regardless of their place in society or their skills and gifts they were
all to be like Jesus. He was faithful
through his life and death. He set the
standard. If we, as individuals, seek to
be and do what He wants us to be and do; we won’t be looking at anyone else and
saying, “I’m glad I’m not like them.”
Instead we will be too focused and busy trying to find ways to introduce
them to Christ, so they can live as free people who have, like you, been set
free. The Lord tells us that we will all
occupy different positions in the body of Christ, the church. He also tells us that this same role in the
church is the model we will be towards the world and unsaved. The saying that we are the only Bible some
people will read is powerful. Powerful
in a positive way if we’re a good read and negative if we are not a good
read. What are you? Are you busy comparing yourself to
others? Do you waste time declaring your
status or sharing how you know Jesus?
What would people say if they could be candid at your funeral? If you were to die today, what would you say
about your life and how it has been spent?
You see, the real issue is not what we
have or don’t have. It’s not delineated
to the number of friends and how successful we have been taking down the
competitive person or business. The real
issues is choosing, regardless of consequence, Jesus and his command to glorify
God with all of our life. Don’t be
distracted. Don’t teach your children to
be like you. Don’t forget Jesus when you
are the coach of the local kid’s soccer team.
Choose to be a positive representative of Jesus in every area of your
life. That “choice” is called
“faithfulness” and is imperative in bringing people to Jesus. The Holy Spirit uses us only when we are
surrendered to be used by God for God.
If we are not surrendered, we are unable to hear the voice of the Holy
Spirit. Surrendered goes hand in hand
with faithfulness. Consequently, we are
in charge of our losing control. When we
are surrendered and being faithful we no longer compare ourselves with
others. We are no longer jealous for
what “they” have. There is no exhausting
doing this or that to be “good enough.”
There is peace. The Word is spread
to our world(s) and all anyone sees is Jesus.
You do know that pie in the sky is still
just pie in the sky? Pie in the sky is a
humorous way to say, “I’m not perfect!
That’s just the way it is.” So,
then your witness has fracture lines where the enemy can enter and work to
destroy what Christ has constructed.
Satan wants you to be ineffective in all ways associated with
Jesus. He is called the “god of this
world” in the Bible. We don’t need to
blame everything on him either. If we
are ineffective then Satan really doesn’t have much to worry about because we
aren’t doing anything for God anyway. I
chose the title “Living for God” as opposed to “Living For Yourself” because we
are not supposed to live for ourselves.
We, in our individual relationship with Christ are responsible to
God. If we are faithful in our
faithfulness to God, there is no living for yourself. Can you live “with” what your life has
represented to Jesus? That is one tough
question! That question does have an
answer.
So how do we live “with” ourselves when
we are a fallen person? How do we
arrange our day to be His day instead?
If I get up in the morning and say, “Steve, you are no longer fat.” I
lie to myself. Furthermore, I set in
motion a plan of the enemy where I will spend the day rationalizing and
justifying what I eat and drink. At the
beginning of the day I am fat and at the end of the day I am fat. You can use whatever issues you may have as
an example. You understand that it’s not
about my being fat or skinny? It’s not
germane whether I do a comb over to cover my bald spot (I don’t have one). Nor is it a matter of eating the right
breakfast, read the right newspaper and deal with other distractions. You see, the only thing that matters when I
die is that I hear, “Well done good and faithful servant.” from the Lord. You
see, God isn’t concerned about the outside.
He’s not concerned if you have one car or five cars. He couldn’t care less if you belong to the
country club or not. The amount of money
in your account is of no concern on His part.
He observes and listens and interacts with those whose hearts are
surrendered to God. That includes all
mankind. In this world of distractions,
we find it difficult to discipline ourselves.
What is it that God wants from your life? He wants you and me to be honest and open to
his clear direction in our lives as part of his plan for his people. He doesn’t want you to compare yourself as
better than as or worse than other believers.
Dying to self is choosing life.
The dead me goes away and the live me is risen with Christ. Paul says, “It is no longer I who live but
Christ who lives within me.”
The Scriptures listed under the chapter
titles are the fruits of the spirit. It
is a list of what we are to be. I don’t
know about you, but I have wrestled many times with more than one of the
character traits that Jesus wants to see in my life. If I were not forgiven the weight of those
choices would have put me in my grave long ago.
Most of the time I am unable to go through a day able to live out the
firsts Beatitude much less do justice to the rest of them. Jesus had pity on people like me and turned
the 10 Commandments into the 2 Commandments.
We are to love God and love our fellow man. I cannot seem to accomplish these two every
day! Here is where we meet ourselves
comparing yet once again. Whether we
want to believe it or not Jesus knows everything about us. Not just some things; but everything! He knows us from the time we were conceived
in our mother’s womb until the day we enter Heaven. He is aware that we have failed, are failing
and will continue to fail…every day of our life. He knew this from the beginning of time. So, what are we to do? Should we just give up and do whatever with
no regard to what is desired of us by God?
The answer is an empathetic “NO!”
Giving up wasn’t an option for Jesus and is still no option for his
people.
Do you have people who put you on a
pedestal? Have you put yourself on a
pedestal? You are not alone. We all have at one time or another in our
lives. What if we put Jesus on the
pedestal? Would that help us in our
daily life? Yes, it would help. However, if we bring our rules for living
even Jesus on a cross (I mean pedestal) won’t make a difference. There are so many different groups
interpreting the Bible that it is near impossible to gain a consensus amongst
them. People and groups have
“interpreted” the Bible as whatever they needed to justify and rationalize their
living as they do. “In the name of Jesus.”
doesn’t really mean that to those who alter the word of God. They are not being faithful to the Word of
God and have not surrendered their place on the pedestal. If they are not being faithful they are busy
being a distraction rather than a role model.
Focusing on the distraction is so clever that they need to invent new
justification and rationalization wears them out. God says they have their reward.
What do we do? We, at the time of the sin, repent and seek
forgiveness from God and anyone whom our sin affected. It’s been a long time since I have seen a
pastor lead their congregation in this way.
I am not suggesting we all need to stand before the church and expose our
sin. That would be a distraction. Should we daily and sometimes moment by
moment seek the will of God in our lives and repent and ask for forgiveness for
our sins we are making a step in the right direction. We all have had a few people who epitomized
this man or woman of God. They are the
ones who have peace. They are the ones
who are concerned about those who are lost not receiving the grace of God in
salvation through the Son, Jesus Christ.
They are the ones who do so much and seek so little. You know who I’m talking about. You don’t hear them complain. You don’t see them angry. It’s even rare for them to not have a word
about the hope they have in Christ.
There is no comparison. There is
only faithfulness. Their relationship
with God is the only one they focus on.
Humility keeps them in a place where the love of God literally seeps
from them. People cannot help but be
changed by folk like this.
Here is my suggestion: 1. Take care of the log in your own eye
before trying to take the log from another’s eye. 2. be certain to be perfect as the Father in
Heaven is perfect. 3. Rejoice and be
filled with praise and gladness. 4. Seek
to be a vessel to serve the Lord in all areas of your live. 5. Pick up your
cross. (No one is going to pick it up
for you.) 6. Forgive yourself and others
as unforgiveness is an unnecessary burden for anyone to carry. 7. See yourself
as an individual in the image of God.
Be faithful in not comparing yourself to
others.
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