So what is a guy supposed to do?

     With so many choices before us every day we are bound to find ourselves in the quandary of what are we supposed to do.  Which choice will be the best for the situation and still keep us in the right space with God?  This is not especially my forte.  I tend to make choices based on what I want instead of what I need.  Do you ever feel this way?  Come on, I know I'm not the only one out there that has this struggle with doing right.  A guy like you and I need to understand that life isn't about us.  Life is about what we allow to flow in and through us.  Choices.  That's the crux of the matter.  Understanding and recognizing the choices before we act keeps us closer to what we were meant to be both for God as well as for others.  Part of my problem is that when I make a bad choice I have the tendency to throw the baby out with the bath water.  Telling myself that I blew it so I might just as well blow the rest of my choices for the day as well.
     There is a difference between what we are "supposed to do" versus what we simply are "to do."  Yoda and his wisdom come to mind.  Not to "try" but to "do".  Our frame of mind over the eons has taught us that we "can't" just do and we might as well not have that standard.  However, should we examine the truth of our living for and with Jesus we know that we are asked to do and not just supposed to do.  It's been said that the road to hell has been paved with good intentions.  That is what "supposed to do" is; good intentions.  I have a list of "good intentions" detailing projects that are in three categories.  First category is going to be done...sometime.  The second category is partly done and will be done...sometime.  The third category shows my intention to do something...but probably won't do.  Over the years I've been able to accomplish a lot by doing.  I can't say the same for that which I was supposed to be doing. 
     When Jesus walked amongst us he preformed miracles and preached for the people to repent.  Sometimes I think it's a miracle for me to finish a project.  Not just finish the project but doing so in such a way that life is better because of finishing the project.  When I am in "supposed to do" mode, I don't have the better life.  Letting others down is part of the "supposed to do" scenario.  People have expectations on us.  Then when we don't meet those expectations we back away even further and won't commit to doing/being as much as we are capable of.  That reminds me of Moses and the burning bush.  I admire God for his patience in answering Moses  excuses for not just "doing" what he was instructed to do.  Moses telling God what he "can't do" is ludicrous.  Even as a believer I find it difficult to always do what God wants me to do.  Moses provides a role model for us in the positive in that he did what he was supposed to do.  He also provides a role model for best intentions and what he was supposed to be doing. 
     The same can be said about David, Saul, the Apostles, and other important figures in the Bible.  They all knew what they were supposed to do just like you and I.  They also knew failure to do as a central part of their lives.  Todays challenge for me is to go forth and "do".  Should I accept the truth that we are to be doers of the Word I won't find my self wondering what I'm supposed to be doing.  People can pray for me better if I do.  People can expect more from me if I do.  Friends and family will be more endeared to me if I do.  My challenge today is to just "do".  It's your challenge as well. 

Just thought you would like to know.

     I am hypocritical.  There, I said it.  Can you?  It's not that I intend on being hypocritical.  That's not the issue.  Nor do I say it to express my guilt and remorse so that you can emulate me.  That's not the issue.  I could say it to pat myself on the back and put myself one step above everyone else.  That's not the issue either.  The issue is that in saying that I am hypocritical I am telling myself the truth and am in need of careful watchfulness on a daily basis regarding all areas of how I live.  I was born in sin and will die with sin.  So will you.  That's the bad news.  The good news is that Jesus died for ALL of my sins past, present and future.  He knows that I am hypocritical.  He forgives me when I ask and partners with me to do better next time.  Jesus is not hypocritical and can be trusted always to be God. 
     So, what is hypocritical?  Simply stated, being hypocritical is not being true to who you represent yourself to be.  The title of the blog is "Christian Walk" and that implies that I am a Christian.  Your idea of what a Christian is and is not may be different.  That's okay.  We all have out lives to live as we see fit.  Sometimes we need to give grace to others.  I speak in tongues.  Some do not.  I need to see that as okay and not some missing link to life in Christ.  I cannot go through a day without sinning.  You might think you are able to do so.  Good for you!  However, that's not the truth for either of us.  Some issues are specific and necessary.  Admitting who we really are in light of Scripture is essential when issues are specific.  We all sin.  Paul sinned.  The disciples sinned.  Your pastor and mine sinned.  They all did so every day of their lives.  That's what the Bible says.  We will be free from sin when we go home to be with Jesus.  Not before.
     What do we do with someone who is hypocritical?  The Gospels tell us to first examine ourselves and remove the log from our eyes before we try to take the splinter out of our brother/sisters eyes.  I don't know about you but that, for me, takes a long long time.  Self examination prior to looking into other people's junk will be a consuming task as the Holy Spirit reveals areas of your life that are not in line with what Jesus asks us to be.  Whatever we think, say or do are areas where we need to examine and make right what has been made wrong.  Here is the important point:  WE WILL BE SO BUSY WITH THIS TIME CONSUMING TASK THAT WE WILL NO LONGER BE TRYING TO MAKE OTHERS LIKE US.  Nope.  Should we take the Gospel mandate seriously we will spend our time and energy becoming more like Jesus that we won't even find ourselves meddling in others life choices.  That leaves Jesus and the Holy Spirit to work in the hearts, minds and souls of others.  You and I certainly don't have time.
     Don't misunderstand me; we have an obligation to help the brother/sister in sin to turn from that sin.  We don't have the right or the power to make that happen.  So, use the tools that you have.  Pray.  The Bible tells us that "the prayers of a righteous man avails much."  Pray for so and so and then leave them on the altar.  Go back to dealing with your stuff.  The middle word in that quote is "righteous".  It's the prayer of a RIGHTEOUS man that avails much.  Not the prayer of a hypocritical man.  In Matthew 6:33 Jesus tells those listening (that's a clue) that they are to be "perfect even as your Father in heaven is perfect."  Great!  Where does that leave me?  The Greek actually renders this verse to say, "being made perfect as your Father in heaven is perfect."  The action is ongoing and not once in a lifetime.  That's what sanctification is all about.  We all are in need of the Savior and the Holy Spirit to make it trough one day at a time much less to that time when we are called home. 
     I am hypocritical.  I am forgiven.  I am saved.  I am being sanctified.  I am fixed on the goal of heaven.  How about you?

What fills your day?

     I was up this morning at 2:30 AM.  Not because I wanted to be.  I wanted to sleep into the morning...say 9:00 AM.  I have PTSD (complex) and that includes things like chronic insomnia, nightmares, and anxiety.  Life could always be worse and I know people whose PTSD is 100 times worse than mine.  My day is filled with activity to keep me from sitting and dwelling on what caused all of this to begin with.  Some days I am successful at keeping the negative at bay and other days I'm at the mercy of the negative.  Why do I tell you all of this?  Because this is what fills my day and yes I am a Christian.  The stereotype of the Christian has tainted the entire Christian world.  Having all in order, praising God and living happily ever after doesn't apply to many if any.  You may talk the good talk but what are you living?  What fills your day?
     Pretending has taken me away from much happiness.  I pretended my past didn't have any power over me.  I pretended that if I did this or that happiness and fulfillment would follow.  I pretended because all the Christians around me were pretending and it was "the right thing to do."  What I have found is that I don't need to pretend and there ARE people out there who love to see a "real" person who can be real with them.  It's refreshing to find that I'm not the only one who drops into a "depressed hole" from time to time.  Yes, Christians fill their days with this also.  Don't tell me to just say a happy verse and give it to God.  I've done that.  Sometimes what I need to fill my day is you walking beside me saying nothing but saying everything.  Pretending that I was part of only brought me to a place of realization that I didn't fit. 
     So, change takes place and the wounds of the past get dealt with in many different ways.  One of my favorite ways to deal with stress in my day is to go to my garden and pull weeds.  I can pretend that each weed something I am dealing with that day.  I fill my day pulling weeds.  The physical and sexual abuse of my youth, the police involved shooting, the loss of my baby, and paralysis from surgery are always with me.  They are weeds.  There are no roses in that garden.  BUT I can pull weeds and that is what I do.  Sometimes my sister Charlotte pulls weeds with me.  Maybe others come into the garden and chat but don't pull weeds.  That's okay.  I don't allow the telephone in my garden.  Once thing I try to fill my day with is less impersonal communication.  Face to face is always a great way to fill your day. 
     Every morning I begin with my Bible reading, then journal, then emails and onto this blog.  From there I list things I have to do, things I want to do and things I need to do.  Most of them don't get finished.  I list them on paper with my own handwriting so that when I cross them off I can feel a sense of accomplishment.  I try to fill my day with accomplishments.  Last week I took an old tent I had to a homeless person along with a bag of item for personal care.  I didn't have that on my list but God did.  He understands me, my limits and my abilities.  He never brings more upon me than I can bear.  Yep, God has a list too!  What fills His days?  Love for me is on the top of that list.  Love for you as well.  There are many ways to show love to those around you.  Because of my current place in life, I do things like let the person in a hurry ahead of me in the store.  I try to not compete for the roadway.  I am nice to my dog.  He wants me to see him as he sees me.  His day is filled with trying to please me.  Jesus' day is filled with love and wanting to please me...except when I sin.
     Today I will fill my day with thinking on positive things as much as possible.  Verses often read will come to me in my thoughts and in the music that I listen to.  I try to not fill my mind with garbage as that is what comes out when I do so.  I've been there and done that.  Trying to not do it again.  Today I will fill my day with saying positive things to those around me.  That doesn't mean lying to people telling them what they want to hear.  It means honest thoughts and feelings delivered in God's love.  God doesn't just tell me what a good boy I am.  He also tells me to knock it off and be the creature he created me to be.  Today I will fill my day with action that shows I care about something other than myself.  Instead of watching a soccer game on TV I will watch PBS with someone who just needs me to be there and not tuning them out.  Jesus did that all the time.  He still fills his day doing the same.  Patience and understanding are hard to come by today so I may as well do what I can.
     What will you fill your day with?  Excuses?  Less than?  Selfishness?  Complacency?  It's my prayer that you will choose better.  You and those around you deserve better.  Others have a difficult time filling their days with positive when you and I aren't positive.  If I don't make excuses maybe my children won't either.  If I give all of me to what God wants perhaps I can help someone in need.  If I am less selfish maybe I can deliver Jesus to someone in need.  Like food to a beggar.  Wait, I am a beggar!  If I am active I am not complacent.  What fills your day?

Sometimes life is just crazy...and that's okay!

     Every one of us has had a crazy moment in our thoughts at least.  Many of us have acted out that "crazy" in various ways both public and private.  Sometimes our "crazy" is just what the doctor ordered for us to deal with situations or people.  Regardless, "crazy" isn't necessarily a bad thing and certainly isn't something Christians are immune from.  Imagine, if you will, your fiancée tells you she is pregnant.  She's 14 and you are 20 something.  Not unusual for today but how about back in Bethlehem?  THEN you learn she claims that she was impregnated by the Holy Spirit.  Think things are crazy yet?  What does she tell her parents?  What do you tell your parents? Of course your friends all just know what the real story is.  To complicate matters God tells you in a dream to go ahead and marry the girl!  So, you get married and then don't have sex for 10 plus months.  Now that is crazy!
     We put crazy expectations on ourselves, friends, family, and even our enemies.  Murphy gets blamed for more craziness than any other entity on earth.  Yet, we have people say, "Steve, you're just crazy." or "Steve, that's crazy!  How can you think that?"  Eventually we (I) manage to live up to the label and "crazy" becomes the status quo for me.  People expect me to think, say and do crazy things.  How about this, you are walking with me through check out in a local grocery store.  Suddenly you hear me say to the clerk:  "Do you know Jesus as your Savior?"  You might be embarrassed and say, "Oh no, here we go again."  Crazy is foreign to the world when you're a Christian.  God speaks to us and asks us to say and do things that would be deemed inappropriate in many circles.  Crazy is submitting to God and doing what he asks us to do.
     Having had the privilege of leading people to Jesus and salvation; I'm used to crazy circumstances, people and issues.  When we take the time to listen to God, all our contacts seem crazy in the way the world understands life to be.  Crazy takes us out of ordinary and out of the world while keeping us in the world.  I cannot remember a time in my life when "crazy" wasn't present if not leading my life.  Crazy is spontaneous.  You cannot plan what God asks you to do.  The Word tells us that in that moment you and I will be given the words needed to share what we know to be Gods message to others.  In the Bible God used a donkey to speak to and confront one of his people.  Hmm...  What we don't find or label as crazy is the subtle ways Satan speaks to us and around us.  Why is that?  What is sane about serving Satan in any capacity?  God has told us to stand firm against the Devil and he will flee from us.  Try that one in public!  No, I mean definitely try that in public, private and all places in between.
     I'm crazy about my kids, family (okay some of my family), friends, and even my church family.  I'm crazy about ribs barbequed just right.  I'm crazy about old vintage cars and trucks.  I'm crazy about good beer.  I'm crazy about Jesus.  What are you crazy about and how does it guide your life?  My kids, when younger, would ask me where were we going when we got in the car.  I'd tell them we were going to crazy.  They loved it!  My dog wants you to know I'm crazy about him too!

Breathing is essential!

     Without breathing life would cease.  But what if you stopped breathing for a minute by holding your breath?  Or how about the stories of people who have drowned or died by other means then came back from deaths door?  Breathing is good for any number of functions of your body.  Without oxygen for extended times we risk brain damage.  Breathing helps the blood be oxygenated which in turn keeps your body healthy.  Breathing expels carbon oxide which is essential for plant life.  So breathing is essential for all living things.  Breathing in coal dust, smoke, toxic chemicals and such are not good for you or I.  The smog of the city combined with the dangers in the work environment just exacerbate the problem.  Breathing can be dangerous even if it's essential.
     The gift of breathing was given by God to Adam and we all enjoy that gift day in and day out.  We enjoy breathing whether we are awake or asleep.  So, God has created a world for us where we are able to continue to use that gift.  We take breathing for granted though.  I have sleep apnea and for quite a few years would find myself waking up gasping for my breath.  With sleep apnea I stop breathing and need to be restarted.  This interrupts my sleep and causes me to be tired when I wake up.  Sometimes I'm even grouchy.  Several years ago I received a CPAP machine that makes sure that I continue breathing through the night.  Medical marvel never cease to amaze me.  With a restful sleep I have a better attitude and am able to accomplish much more. 
     The gift of physical breath by God is amazing.  Every time I think of my children being born and their first breath of life, I am amazed all over again.  The ability of the body to "start" after leaving the womb is amazing!  God also gave the gift of the Holy Spirit for us to further enjoy his presence and the life we have been given.  We are encouraged to breathe in the Holy Spirit and then live the spirit filled life.  Like our physical breathing, God made the spiritual breathing something needed to sustain the Christian life.  As believers we have been born again and upon our spiritual birth we have been given the breath of life which we continue to breathe in and our on a daily basis. 
     In my years as a police officer I was privileged to administer CPR to a number of individuals who had stopped breathing.  The training was important in order for me to do the job properly.  Administered incorrectly would either render the CPR ineffective or do damage to the person who had stopped breathing.  With each time I administered CPR the story was different and the outcome was either life or death.  Breathing life into someone is exhilarating while attempting to do so and failing is depressing.  Having failed several times I wondered if I was doing any good.  When I would help someone and save their lives, I knew that I was doing good.  Conversely, when I share the Gospel with someone the effect can be the same.  Some will hear and live while others will not hear and die.  Both choices are theirs.  Indeed breathing is essential.

Making do with what you have.

    Last time I checked having possessions was still a luxury afforded to those who earned them.  Okay, that's not quite accurate.  We all have possessions that we haven't earned.  Grandma's gift of underwear, hand me downs from older brothers, or maybe a good book given by a friend before they moved away.  What do all these things have in common?  They are all memories that we possess.  We all have memories.  Some are good, some are bad and some are neutral.  I wish for you and I that all our memories would only be good.  But we possess bad ones too.  Remember that bully at school?  His name was Charles but he demanded that everyone call him "Chucky".  Everyone did except Ms. Fritz in 8th grade who put him in his place.  That is a good memory.  Remember your first kiss?  You didn't know how, she didn't know how and somehow you both completed the kiss.  Then you never stopped!  I'm still making memories.
     There is a memory of a kiss in the Bible that isn't very good.  Judas came to the garden and betrayed Jesus with a kiss on the cheek.  The kind your boyfriend/girlfriend gives you just after they said they didn't want to see you again because they found someone else.  Only worse.  Judas, just like us, had the free choice to make a good memory or a bad memory.  He couldn't very well have stayed out of the event though.  None of us could.  We betray our love of Jesus every time we choose to not listen to him, live with his grace, and pass that grace onto others.  Yet, we continue to do this more frequently than not.  Jesus, in his grace, takes our repentance and turns the tables creating a good memory of forgiven.  That is a real possession.
     People love status.  That status may be in a family, social circle, work setting, or in their own minds.  The status can be a good possession or a bad possession.  Take for instance a couple whom I knew long ago.  He and she had been together for over 50 years.  I met them through our church and called them Mom and Pop like everyone else.  They were practically invisible but had the greatest of possessions.  They came to me when I became a police officer and told me that they were going to be praying for me everyday.  Then they did just that!  What a gift!  I possessed the protection of God through the prayers of a couple who loved God as their primary possession.  Sometimes the gift we give to others is intangible and sometimes it's tangible.  Regardless, the possession is still something you have been given.  
     Through the years I've received, given away, lost and threw away possessions both in selfishness and unselfishness ways.  I've learned through may repeated lessons how precious that which is given and received is to the recipient.  Blessing people should be considered a possession you have received only to give away.  That could mean a listening ear, a loaf of zucchini bread, an extra car given to someone in need, and more.  It could also mean just being silent while holding someone who is bereaved and crying.  Wisdom is a possession.  Sometimes I think it's a superpower as so few seem to use it in a positive way.  Morals are possessions.  Kindness is a possession.  Humility is a possession.  Peace is a possession. 
     I don't know what possessions you have.  You do.  Give them away.

It's Tuesday but should be Friday!

     Once upon a time in a far away galaxy there were no clocks and no one really knew just what day it was.  Why?  Because there were no "weeks, months and years."  The sun shone non-stop and there were never rain clouds in the sky (that takes this out of Washington!).  People had all they needed and some of what they wanted.   There were no time clocks and no bosses looking over one's shoulder.  Everyone contributed to the good of the whole and selfishness had no place in this utopian world.  Okay, just where and when can I catch the train to this place?!  Even though people go to work here on planet Earth, some still don't know what day, time or even month it might be.  We go about our lives overtaxing our bodies, families, friends and mentally need a break.  Coffee can't fix it and crashing for naps don't even begin to fix what's ailing us. 
     We have a world of regimen set in place over the eons because we needed structure, form and of course function.  That being said, we have created what we have the responsibility to keep the structure in place modifying it from time to time.  With the advent of working from home, electronic workplaces, video conferencing and a million other things I sometimes don't understand; our world has changed.  Don't want to get up to go to an 8-5 work day?  Choose your hours.  Don't want to deal with people in person?  Choose to use technology where you can limit your time and scope of interaction.  Don't want to punch a time clock?  Use a download that clocks your time for you.  There are all kinds of ways to not do the 8-5 Monday through Friday.  I have a friend who works from home, works during the middle of the night and all his customers are overseas.  Wow! 
     Why do we need to work in the first place?  Because Adam and Eve blew a good thing.  They had the world described in the first paragraph.  Because they blew it that world went away and was replaced with "work."  Work then morphed to what we have today.  Some can't seem to catch up while others are trying to get those who work for them to catch up.  People are hired, fired and replaced by two 20's when they get to be too "old" for the company.  What we once felt were safety nets as the norm are gone.  There are only two absolutes:  death and taxes.  Why the cynical world and why do we choose it?  Are you ready for the answer? 
     We have the situation we are in (good or bad) because of how we submit to Jesus.  It's that simple.  People who call themselves Christians have Christ living within them.  Should that be true for you, it's Christ who works through you and Christ who is your boss.  When we begin to accept the reality we are to be working for God, many of the frustrations we feel fall away and are replaced with peace.  When was the last time you grumbled at your work?  How about the last time you resented getting up and going to work in the first place?  Maybe you grumbled about your boss or co-workers or clients.  The man or woman who is working for Jesus has a tough job to do only that the world doesn't recognize that we are doing so.  Stepping up to the plate and doing what Jesus would do takes a lot of surrender.  However, the rewards are incredible! 
     What would happen if you were to begin each and every day giving it to Jesus in prayer?  What would happen if you only chose to do as Jesus would do?  What would your benefits be both at work and home if you exercised your faith and left all the rest to God?  There's only one way to find out.  Today is Tuesday.  Not just any Tuesday.  It's Tuesday of a new work opportunity.  What is your choice going to be?

So, what do we worship?

     That is probably one of the more loaded questions I have put forth in some time.  However, it's a valid question requiring a valid answer.  The Bible is full of verses that say we are to only worship God.   As we consider the definition of worship we must also consider the context.  Worship takes our focus.  If our focus is elsewhere we are no longer worshiping God but rather worshipping other people, things, activities or whatever captivates your life.  Our focus determines the direction of where we take our worship.  Is our worship exclusionary or inclusionary?  The world has seen fit to create philosophies, beliefs, divisions and other mucky muck rendering our worship to be whatever we like, whenever we like, in whatever fashion we like.  This is the inclusionary worship and the focus is on self.  The Bible is exclusionary rendering worship to be to and for God.  We always have the choice.  Worship can be of worldly nature and selfish in ends or it can be heavenly in nature and unselfish in its ends. 
     There are all kinds of religious thoughts, beliefs, and methods and manner of worship.  I won't go into all of them and am not going to write a book about how little I know.  Rather, I'd like us to evaluate our worship in terms of selfish versus unselfish.  Does what we worship cause us to be selfish or unselfish?  Does the car I drive, the boat I own, or the home I live in show my pride and selfishness or unselfishness?  Look around yourself.  Where are there signs of unselfishness?  Who do you share your "stuff" with?  Does the sport, investment, or goals show how unselfish I am or do they condemn my selfishness?  Does the life I live represent what "I" have built?  Do the possessions reflect what "I" earned, bought and possess?  Where can others see that we have been both blessed and are blessing others?  Does our heart continually seek to serve or be served?  What is it that drives you and I to our serving or being served?  Is it selfishness or unselfishness? 
     Now, before you leave nasty comments, there are times when we will find that people do truly use what they have been blessed with as unselfish tools to bless others.  There are times when the witness of unselfishness is so clear that the issue of what we are worshipping isn't even a question.  What we come down to is a weighty matter of what is in and coming from our hearts.  Where are our hearts?  What have the past generations filled our hearts with?  Did anyone plant the seed of unselfish worship in the depth of your heart?  Of my heart?  Where do we see the growth and evidence of a heart focused on what we can do for others?  Jesus said that out of the heart will flow what is in the heart.  If we put garbage in (selfishness) we can not expect anything but garbage out.  What is it we are putting into the hearts of our children?
     Mind games are interesting when it comes to worship.  Should anyone (man or woman or organization) expect, ask for, or demand your attention so much that you are asked to deny the focus of unselfishness in your heart; it's a selfish mind game.  Satan is good at this.  Pitting us against each other and coaching our thoughts and decisions to where the question for today becomes really pointed and essential.  You have heard it said that you are what you practice.  It's true.  You ARE what you practice.  What does the world around you have to say about your worship?  What do they see that would move them to an unselfish lifestyle?  In the end, we all must make the daily decision as to what we are going to worship today as well as tomorrow.  Unselfishness or selfishness?  It's your choice...always.

 
 
 

Life is a bowl full of cherries!

     Whoever said tat life is a bowl full of cherries hadn't the experience of tossing one in your mouth that was either sour or going bad.  I know that the analogy is lame but it works.  Sitting here reading and writing I had a bowl of cherries (they are gone now...except the bad one) that I was eating from.  Engrossed in my reading and writing I wasn't looking at the cherries that I was popping in my mouth.  Sure enough, when I bit down my mouth was filled with this awful taste!  Yep, a rotting one amongst the batch.  After spitting it out and rinsing my mouth I resumed my same activities.  No more rotten cherries as I looked at each one as I put them in my mouth.  Life is like that.  We think innocently and over time experience and knowledge take away the innocence of life.  Expecting cherries we now accept that there may be bad cherries or sour cherries from time to time.  We just need to look, watch and not trust that all the bad cherries have been removed from the bag packaged for us. 
     Life tosses us more good cherries than it does bad or sour cherries.  Sometimes it seems that I focus unduly on the bad or sour instead of the good.  When this becomes a habit I tend to get cynical about other areas of life as well.  The main problem with circumstances or cherries is the unknown nature of each until you experience them.  Circumstances aren't always what they seem to be and neither do cherries.  When suffering a loss it's difficult for me and others to come to grips with any kind of loving message from God to us or others.  I especially have problems when these bad or sour cherries happen to children.  Trying to see good with a child being wheeled into surgery is difficult.  Their little body on the adult sized stretcher is an image burned into my memory.  What I didn't know was God was using this circumstance to build empathy in me toward others.  That would come later.  Losing a baby was very difficult.  Understanding the sanctity of life from that experience took me to an entirely new level of how I value all life.  I'm no saying I look for bad or sour cherries to have the experience.  No one should.  What I am saying is that we all need to have our bad and sour cherry moments in order to appreciate what God is doing either in our lives or the lives of others
     You will noticed that my experience listed above was coached in the "engrossed" statement.  It's when we are so focused on the big picture that we are then left with the little picture that slams into our reality.  Bad cherries are picked or delivered too late while sour cherries are delivered too early.  Herein lies the problem.  Timing.  There is a plan and it is being worked out with or without me.  There is a choice I can make daily.  I can look at the bowl of cherries and see if there are any that are bad.  Once discovered I can rid the bowl of bad cherries.  I can also use the same process to remove the sour cherries.  Once both are removed from the bowl of cherries I can eat without looking with no fears of biting into a bad or sour cherry.  As I go about my business I can have easy travelling with no bad cherries laying there as speed bumps. 
     We don't have to be alone in life and watching this life lesson addressed. There is an old saying stating: "Four eyes are better than one."  When I allow God and my fellow Christian (trusted) to look into my life I also give them permission to examine what is inside of me.  There they can identify the bad cherries as well as the sour ones.  They can be addressed and in the future quite possibly be avoided totally.  Life is always about the bowl full of cherries no matter whether you change or not.  No change in us indicates we don't mind eating rotten fruit.  Next time you find yourself eating a bowl full of cherries remember that they are in your hands.

You are probably wondering why I've gathered you here.

     Yes, we are summoned to gatherings of different natures and statures.  Being summoned to the principals office over the school loudspeaker is ominous to any teenager.  Being summoned to dinner is an entirely different ball of wax.  When we are summoned or someone summons us, our minds go sideways.  We vacillate between feeling fearful and guilty to euphoria!  Depends on the circumstances for most of us.  We are given a traffic court "summons" which is a fancy word for ticket for something we didn't do.  If we did do it we have an excuse as to why we shouldn't be summoned.  Tomorrow many of you will be summoned to a Father's Day event.  Some look forward to this summons and for others the summons is another nail in the relationship closet.  So, what would it look like to have a summons that was always positive in nature and not demanding on us at all?  Would we be more able to handle that scenario in a positive way?  I think so.
     For various reasons I was a bad boy in high school.  It came as no surprise that I was summoned to the principals office over the loudspeaker one day.  Classmates just snickered and nodded their heads as they assumed that finally I was going to get what I deserved.  There were 3 others who were summoned as well.  All had been labeled as bad boys.  I knew I hadn't done anything wrong that particular day and it was only an hour or so after lunch.  When I walked into the principals office, there stood the County Sheriff.  When the four of us were all there the principal said the sheriff would like to talk with us.  The sheriff, it seemed, was taking a proactive stance on the upcoming Halloween night activities in order to protect the community from us.  What he did next was to summon us to be ride-along partners with his officers so that we would stay out of trouble.  And we would be paid!  What a shocker!  Of course we did it.  The money was the ticket.
     Once upon a time there was no fear when people were summoned.  Adam and Eve had intimate walks and talks with God himself in the garden.  Yet, after they sinned, when God summoned them for fellowship the first thing they did was to hide.  The second thing was to express their fear of being seen naked.  So they took it upon themselves to alter their world (put on clothing) and then made excuses for their actions and inaction's.  Is that any different than what we do today?  We do the same thing day in and day out.  All the while God is wanting to draw near and to minister to us, meet our needs and have sweet fellowship with each of us.  God put a price on this action when he sent Jesus to die on the cross, be buried and resurrected on the third day for US!  We have a second chance every day.  Even every moment of every day! 
     What is God summoning you to in your life in Him?  What stands in the way of our answer and action?  These and other questions are good starting places to change our perception of why God is summoning us to do His work.  He has gathered us here for a purpose.  We are summoned to be loved by him, cared for by him, and brought home to Heaven by him.  The least we can do is summon those around us to the same thing.  Everyone has the ultimate choice to answer or ignore the summons.  Perhaps today would be a good day to answer His summons.

Today is complicated.

     Dealing with a plate full and overflowing.  I will return tomorrow.  Hope you all have a good day and are blessed.

Thanks,
Steve

It just boggles the mind!

     There I was minding my own business when I read the news.  I knew better!  However, once a door has been opened, even a crack, you can't help but remember what you see or hear.  Our world is in a mess.  Crime is rampant, abuse is out of control, corruption is around every corner and it's no longer able to tell the good guys from the bad guys.  Church massacre, politician exposed, police shootings, and full emergency room 24/7.  That's what we are faced with day after day.  Doesn't matter if you live in Goodrich, North Dakota or Olympia, Washington; no one is immune from the havoc being delivered on his generation.  I haven't even mentioned the 1.5 million babies aborted every year in America, the genocide in many countries overseas, or the starving children on multiple continents.  What is going on?!  All of this is before us because mankind has failed to act as God has told us to act.  When we do nothing the results are visited on us and future generations.
     In spite of the items listed in the above paragraph, there is some consolation that some are acting and some are standing up, and some are sounding the alarm.  Just because it's not all bad doesn't make what is going on okay.  The Bible says our world needs to get worse than it was in the days of Noah before the Lord will come back.  Hello!  The first paragraph isn't bad enough!  It makes you wonder why we do anything so that His return is hastened?  For many doing nothing is just not an option.  Jeremiah was told by God to stop praying for the Israelites because they were such a disobedient people.  Jeremiah told God, "I cannot not pray for the people."  He, like many of us, found he needed to do something even though the prognosis was not good.  His motive was God's heart.  Others, even Christians, motivation is more selfish and destructive in nature.  Even today.  Giving of ourselves to others is worthless if it's not what God has put on our hearts to do.
     Though the circumstances are dire in the world today, what boggles my mind is the nonchalant way we Christians live our lives.  The "someone else will do it." mentality permeates our faith.   Christians stand by while all kinds of evil are visited upon our neighbors, friends and families.  We don't even care about our enemies!  How crazy is that?  This is what is happening to fellow Christians.  What we don't do and do to the unsaved is even worse.  I'm guilty here as well as you are.  I'm preaching to the choir.  When we don't care about the salvation, life and future of others we make a mockery of what Christ did for us.  We are politically correct, not wanting to offend others and stand by while evil triumphs.  We argue about what color to paint the church bathroom but fail to see the homeless sleeping behind the church dumpster night after night.  What good is our faith if we stand by and do nothing?
     We have numbed our hearts and compassion is far from our grasp.  We've accepted the compassion Christ has for us but refuse to give that same compassion to others.  Our own inaction condemns us even before we act.  It just boggles the mind!  The real question isn't whether or not the church will change and take up the cross of Christ.  It's not even encouraging others to do their Christian duty.  The real question is what will YOU do?  Will you be able to stand before God and come up with some reason you held onto your possessions while so many had none?  Perhaps you can explain to God how he made a mistake and his enemies are your enemies?  Whatever you do, don't be found believing that any of us are going to get away unjudged.  Don't be deceived that our inactions will not be looked at in the same was as our actions.  The greatest sin is to be able to do something and not do anything.  Are you boggling the mind of God?

In between other people's emergencies.

     There is so much truth in that statement!  What happened that our lives have come to this point?  How did this come about that we are so intertwined that we have lost track of being our brothers/sisters keeper?  When will we wake up and understand that crossing the line only causes us to be less than God needs us to be.  Who do others think that we are when they ask us to give up ourselves to be what they need us to be.  Where am I going with all of this.  Hopefully, there will be a balanced answer as we end the blog today.  Posing questions is the easy part.  Creating realistic answers is the hard part.  Questions merely point out the obvious.  Creating realistic answers causes us to make choices even when we don't to.  Being an integral part of a group demands that we have something to add for the good of the group.  The same goes for husband/wife, grandparent/grandkids, friends/enemies, and a host of other examples.  Some of which are peculiar to your situation.  Regardless, other people's emergencies need not be ours. 
     The average Christian (real Christian) has a difficulty saying "No." much less meaning no.  The old saying, "An emergency on your part doesn't dictate an emergency on my part." comes to mind.  Defining relationship as well as emergencies helps us to draw boundaries.  What constitutes an emergency for one person is a mere inconvenience for another.  Yes, I know your car broke down and your kids want to get to soccer practice.  The key word in that sentence is "want".  We have lots of wants that we translate into needs.  Yes, the kids do want to go to soccer.  No, they don't need to go to soccer.  Especially if there is not readily available transportation.  Often we turn to the first person we think will say "Yes." and leave the others as reserve options.  Instead of calling another soccer parent, they call you, the person who just got off work, hasn't had dinner, is shot from not saying "no" at the office.  Yep, that would be you and I.  How did we get into this mess in the first place? 
     Believers are experts as guilt trips.  The world is even better!  Guilt is played like a good hand of poker.  The better the hand and the longer you have played the more able to transfer guilt to another when needed.  "Remember when I did ______ for you?"  "You have been such a good friend, won't you do this for me?"  The implications in both quotes is that if you don't say yes, your relationship will change and not for the positive.  This game that is played out in millions of situations by Christians every day is not found as a basic expectation of the Christian life.  It's really okay to say "no" and to let the chips fall where they may.  I remember a book that I read over 20 years ago.  The title was: "Do I have to give up me to be loved by you."  Wow!  That's exactly what guilt trips are intended to do.  If you don't give up yourself then I won't love you.  Can't you just feel the love?  This doesn't mean we don't do what we can when we can how we can and where we can.  We are part of the body and have a place that is intended to make the most of what we have to offer.  Again, no one has "walked all over" written in their job.
     I've been known to "drop everything" in order to help someone in need.  I've known many people who do the same.  The healthy person who does this isn't operating from a guilt position.  The person who is able to drop everything and be there is in that space because someone has been there in that capacity for them.  That's what the Christian and the church is supposed to be doing.  Neglecting this calling is disobedience to the mandate God has given for us to bring the Gospel to all the earth.  Remember that often actions speak louder than words.  Many times non-believers have come to me with their emergencies because they know I am a Christian and will do what I say I will do.  They subsequently have some level of belief and that is what should be the result.  Assessing other people's needs and putting forth your limitations is essential in maintaining balance in our lives.  Wants are never emergencies.  Needs can be.  It's your choice...it's always been your choice.

Just what are we searching for?

     With the multi-level confusion of the world we live in battering us like waves against a small boat this is the question we ask.  Just what is it that we are searching for?  There are lots of pat answers and grandiose plans.  But what is it that captivates the very essence of our soul?  I believe that if you asked people there would be quite the spread from, "I don't know." to "world peace."  The ability of man to ask the questions of life don't equip him or her necessarily with the ability to find or even understand the answers.  Wrestling with what we search for is as old as creation itself.  Even today the most intelligent and brightest of the world as asking that question seeking to move further than where they currently live with knowledge.  Knowledge in and of itself is good, but being able to ply that knowledge into something that contributes to society takes action.  So does searching.  Action planned is not action. 
     The often quoted, "I think, therefore I am." isn't true.  Sorry all you who have believed that statement.  I'm sure it was well intended but it stops short of having any mention of what is after the thought.  I think I am rich.  My bank account says I'm not.  I think I'm handsome.  Many would think that is erroneous and egotistical.  You see, the thought alone doesn't do anything.  There can come good from thinking but only if there is application of what is found.  Don't get me wrong; there is nothing wrong with thinking.  I wish there were many more in my world who would begin thinking.  Common sense has become so rare that it's classified as a superpower!  Okay, I didn't think that one up.  I saw it somewhere.  The truth of common sense is valid.  The application of common sense takes initiative.  Common sense tells us that we can not only think but also apply what we learn.
     Just what are we searching for?  Why are we searching?  Many of us have or have had "searching" as part of our jobs or careers.  Police officers search for criminals, search crime scenes, and search for closure for victims.  Medical professionals search for ways to ease the pain of patients.  Teachers search for ways to reach this or that student or student groups.  The UPS driver searches for my address.  Why?  Because they have a job to fulfill.  There is an expectation on each and every one of us to contribute to the general well being of the world we live in.  Victor Frankel wrote a book entitled "Man's Search for Meaning."  Herein lies a truth.  We do search for meaning.  Some search for the nebulous while others search for the tangible.  When we take our thinking, move it into action, and reap the rewards, we find meaning. 
     The Bible is full of "hints", "clues", and outright "directives" as to what it takes to find out who we are and what place we have in the world we occupy.  When describing the church Jesus talks about the members of the body of believers as ALL having a place AND a task to do.  There is no room for those who don't think, act and just do nothing.  Our complacency in not engaging the search causes not only lack of personal growth but also robs those around us of the contribution we bring to the table.  Ultimately, should we continue the search, each one of us will come to understand that we are searching for fulfillment; personal and corporate.  Our identities are in the process of being completed and we are dependent on the question asked.  Just what are we searching for?

My reality check bounced!

     Reality has a bad habit of getting in the way we want our lives to go.  Between bursting bubbles and ruining fantasies, reality has a full time job.  Some of the time we need reality to place us solidly on ground that doesn't give way to the earthquakes and tornados that come our way.  Choosing between reality and non-reality is sometimes difficult because we enjoy the earthquakes and tornados a little to much.  We can enjoy both worlds only if we are prepared for the consequences of choosing one or the other.  I can choose to speed on the freeway and do so.  I know that for the most part I can go 8 miles over the speed limit and not get a ticket.  Then there are the exceptions where reality comes into play.  It's raining and no longer safe to go anything over the speed limit.  Do I risk the ticket?  This is the dance we do with so many issues in our lives.  When I've engaged the bubbles and fantasies to the point they have become my reality I am in big trouble.  Here reality is not only needed but absolutely essential for my health and welfare.  Someone or something has to bring me back to earth.  Reality is able to do just that...even if I don't like it.
     It's at this point in the earthquake or tornado that my reality check bounces.  My definitions of different things in life may be fantasy based, misinformed based, lie based, or just lack of knowledge based.  Should my definitions, which I live by daily, come into conflict with reality something has to give.  Sometimes reality has to act like a strong river that wears down its banks so that the course can be changed.  The more I try to keep the river from making it's evolution, the longer I avoid reality.  We can only fight the forces of reality so long before we are overwhelmed with the pressure and need for change.  When this happens we again have a choice.  We can engage the change or we can put up the wall and turn our backs.  I've done both but don't consider myself an expert on either point.  It was Freud who said, "Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar."  While I would like to make rationalizations and justifications about "my" reality; there are times when I just need to admit that my fantasy and balloons are not reality. 
    When Jesus asked the disciples to tell him who they thought he was there were a number of replies.  But the reply that Peter gave was the most telling of all.  He said, "You are the Christ, the Son of the living God."  Reality had set in.  Peter, the most stubborn of all the disciples, had his reality check and it passed.  When we are met with the same question, who do we say we are much less who Jesus is?  As a Christian do we live with balloons and fantasies or do we live in reality?  It's a matter of view and necessity.  The world sees the Christians reality as balloons and fantasies.  The Christian sees the worlds reality as balloons and fantasies.  Which to choose?  For the most part this shouldn't even be a question for the Christian.  We either believe in the reality of God or we don't.  The implications are real, we have the choice.  Whatever choice we take, we also take the consequences (positive or negative) that come with the choice.  Further, we pass on that choice to that circle around us where we have influence.  We portray Christ to our children, spouses, friend, family, co-workers and even our enemies in such a way that either reality is altered or made sound.
     Today is a reality.  I will, by the grace of God, live yet another day.  Reality is Christ can take me home anytime he wants according to His will and not mine.  Today is a time of many choices as to engaging reality or not.  I will choose reality as much as I can with who I am and what I know.  That's about all I can do for today.  Tomorrow my reality check may bounce.

Looking beyond myself.

     We don't do this much.  What does it mean to look beyond myself?  Am I so self-consumed that all I can see is me and how the world rotates around me?  What's out there?  Should I be removed from the equation, what would that same world look like?  Would people really miss me should I be absent?  All of these questions come to play when we begin to wonder where we fit, how we fit, and what we are supposed to be doing with life.  I wish I could tell you this is a one time thing that is completed at age 18 when we graduate from high school.  It would be nice to have things so set in our lives (in a positive way) that we no longer need to ponder the question nor the responsibility of the answer.
     Quite simply our lives and the lives of those around us change all the time.  Priorities change.  Likes change.  Dislikes usually remain the same.  Looking beyond myself requires 3 parts.  First we must never forget our past for fear that we will only repeat it.  Forgetting the past gives us no focus point on where we have come from, the good or bad that has taken place, and the people who have been part of that time.  Second, we need to stay in the present.  Taken at it's base meaning, we decide to take life one day at a time not based on the past or the future but on the present.  Living today for today eliminates the burden of both the past and the future.  Neither of which we are capable of changing.  Third, we need to have a dream, vision or some other goal that draws us forward.  The input for this dream, vision, or goal should come out of what we are giving away (ourselves) rather than what we are taking. 
     One of Jesus' oft used phrases is "take no thought".  Take no thought of tomorrow, what you eat, what you wear, what you possess.  Take no thought of what you want but rather focus on what you need and what others need.  Take no thought of self promotion at home, work, or in the community.  Take no thought of your personal gain and certainly take no thought of forcing your agenda into the lives of others.  When we live beyond ourselves, we deny ourselves.  Self denial is simply difficult action that often results in the freedom to do what God wants us to do.  When we take no thought of ourselves, we have the time and place and means to take thought of others.  Looking beyond myself is the only means by which we can portray Christ to a needy world.
     We are all selfish people to one degree or another.  In fact, we are so selfish that we have become a world of consumers instead of a world of producers.  We believe we have the right to take and expect others to give just to satisfy our selfishness.  How do we overcome this and begin to look beyond ourselves?  I believe that telling the truth about myself is the first step.  I am a sinner in need of the grace of God.  Taking the grace of God should be the last selfish act that any of us take when we take what Christ did for us to secure our salvation.  From there on out we should be unselfishly giving away that same grace.  If we live our days giving away the grace of God we will have no time or desire to look beyond ourselves, live in the past or plan on the future.  I know it's a maverick concept.  You and I know that there will be rewards for our faithful selfless living and maybe even keep that in the front of our minds.  Go, live a life where you look beyond yourself.

Recounting my blessings.

     Six years ago today I had surgery on my shoulder.  When I woke from anesthesia I was paralyzed down due to an "accident" moving me from the gurney to the operating table.  For a week I lay in a hospital bed unable to move from the waist down.  Recovery has been long and ongoing.  But, I am in recovery!
     Last year during an ultrasound a lump was discovered and my doctor thought I most likely had cancer.  Cancer!  Waiting for tests, contemplating the best to the worst scenarios, telling my family and friends and more were pure torture.  Yet, the end result was that the growth was not cancerous and I could relax.  Today I do not have cancer.
     On February 16th of this year I was working in the yard moving firewood rounds to where they would be split and stored.  I felt tired and shortly after that had a heart attack.  Double bypass surgery was on the 23rd and then recovery.  But, I have recovery!  I could very well have died or been disabled from the heart attack.  Today my heart is stronger than ever.
     We all have blessings that have come from the positive experiences in our lives.  They are the ones we like to focus on.  Out of happy circumstances has come happy blessings.  Theses are not a common as we think.  Prayer groups have been mobilized at all times of the day and night for someone here or there in peril.  Why?  Because we have been impacted with something negative from a laceration to death of a loved one.  You see, when we are already in a positive place in life the blessing is expected.  When we are in the negative place in life we are wondering where the blessing is or will come from.  In all three examples above I was not happy and certainly did not feel blessed.  In all three examples my life was devastated and left in a mound of junk on the floor.  It's very hard to see much less believe that good will come out of some situations.  When someone tells me that everything will turn out okay; I don't feel blessed. 
     I try to do something radical every day.  No, I don't go to street protests where I might be arrested.  That would not be a blessing.  No, I do things for others and don't tell anyone I have done them. It may be as simple as paying the bill for an elderly couple in a restaurant.  It might be doing something nice for my neighbor.  Perhaps that which is done in secret is the blessing we all seek anyway.  Giving out of my excess (I have been blessed with a lot) to those who don't have.  One of the blessings I like to give out is to listen.  People want to have someone who will listen.  We don't want to have a counseling session, we just want to be able to talk with someone.  Blessings for others are not ignored.  God says that if we bless others, he will bless us.  Notice that God doesn't say we will avoid negatives in our lives.
     Sometime, when you have the time, check out all the events, conversations, relationships where you were blessed.  Write them down for a permanent record you can look back on.  Tell yourself that you are blessed AND then give the blessing away.  You cannot give away enough blessing.  What you can do is help others to have hope in difficult times.  Friends and family were strong supporters and maintained a deep level of love for me in those three times in my life and many more!  Whether we like it or not, we tend to forget the exercise of recounting our blessings.  We need to have the remembrance in order to appreciate the blessing.  Have a blessed day!

A pattern of habits.

     We are creatures of habit.  We have our routines from our waking through our sleep.  There are few areas of our lives where habits aren't visible. Some of our habits are positive and others are negative.  Some are innocuous while others are toxic.  We blame our bad habits on others or circumstances all the while taking credit for our good habits.  There is a habit in and of itself.  We habitually turn to the familiar in order to avoid the unknown.  While this isn't necessarily bad, the method of our madness leaves us less risky, less adventurous and less inclined to act and live outside of our box.  We have habits of greeting people, doing safety checks before we leave the house, and set aside time for what is important to us first and others second.  Our habits are very seldom surrendered to God though.  That's one habit that we find it difficult to form in our daily lives. Habits cost us and those around us.  They also bless us and those around us.
    It's the pattern of habits that form who we are and who we are becoming.  If we want to be the best in whatever field of work we choose, we must form habits surrounding how we learn, how we apply and what we do with the successful and unsuccessful habits afterwards.  Many times the habits we form are contrary to the driving force within us.  Take for example the night person who has to wake up early.  Their needed habit of getting up on time to get ready and go is essential to keeping their jobs and income stream.  I know many people who are NOT morning people.  Perhaps you are one of them.  I also know many people who are not night people.  That would include me.  Though sometimes our habit is not out of necessity but more seems to be just there.  I wake up fully awake which drives those who have to have an hour long shower and at least 2 cups of coffee before they can really open their eyes and think.  This first habit of the day leads to the next.
     There are people who are habitually early and habitually late to whatever it is they are going to.  It still is important to acknowledge that at least they arrived at their destination.  How effective they are is different.  Hectic and frenzied behavior is not my idea of being in a good work space.  How we deal with the second habit begets the third habit.  Do we work competently, engage well in our relationships, have morals and ethics on the freeway?  Are we "present" during that meeting, lunch or whatever else we have going on in our day?  Regardless, those who are early and those who are late to whatever event or work have the habit of leaving on time.  Amongst all these habits are those like making sure that you don't stink and have good breath.  It's also important to use correct grammar and to express yourself intelligently.  Habit causes us to be prepared.  Habitually prepared. 
     Your habits are different from mine. Etiology is the study of first causes or first things.  When we study our lives, we need to ask ourselves what is the single important habit to be who God wants us to be.  So, I begin my day with a cup of coffee (first) and then I read my Bible and do my devotions.  This is followed by  my journaling about yesterday, today and tomorrow.  These three habits are essential for the beginning of my day...every day.  When I don't have one of them completed, I feel like a habitual daily runner who has to miss running one day.  Something is just off and throws off the rest of the day no matter how good that day may go.  It takes discipline to begin your pattern of habits as a Christian.  No matter what the excuse, we need to discipline our whole world into submission to the will of God. 
     The pattern of habits you form today will continue to morph into what God has for your life and the lives of those you are invested in.  The professionals say that it takes 14 days to break a bad habit and 14 days to begin a good habit.  Don't be the person who just adds the good habit.  That part is easy and easily avoiding the problems of the bad habits.  Don't make excuses.  Make good habits beginning your day habitually with God who will take you through that and every day.

Plan A or plan B?

     I chose to get out of bed this morning...plan A.  I was tempted to stay in bed this morning...plan B.  It's not so complicated when we look at the everyday choices we make.  Part of making the choice between A and B is how we complicate the task.  Making coffee in the morning is a plan A if there ever was one!  I cannot at this time and place in my life imagine NOT having coffee in the morning.  In fact, the only thing that could make morning coffee an even better plan A would be to have it already made for me when I wake up.  Okay, we all know there are machines that are programmable complete with the grinding of fresh beans.  There still has to be other plan A choices in order to eventually come to my first cup of coffee in the morning.  There needs to be an adequate supply all that is involved in making coffee.  Ever try using substitute paper for a coffee filter?  Definitely a plan B thing!  There needs to be a working means of actually making the coffee.  Someone has to do the dishes so that there is a cup or travel mug available.  Did anyone buy the creamer that I like or does it have to be black today?  You see, there is more to the initial plan A than just getting out of bed and pouring myself a cup of coffee.  Life is like that.  What we do today is part of tomorrows plan A and plan B. 
     Let me be very clear here so that there is no mistaking my life history.  I have all to often chosen plan B even when I knew plan A was better.  That was the case with Eve and Adam in the garden and so it is with me today.  The Bible tells me that God knew me before I was formed in my mothers womb and knew everything I would think, do and say throughout my whole life.  He knew in advance every plan B that I would choose and what it would take for me to get back to plan A.  With that knowledge in hand I'm surprised that he has put up with me!  Sometimes our plan A is flawed because of how we understand and define life.  For instance, the person who grows up without any feelings or communications of love has a definite disadvantage in making plan A choices about their love of God, others or self.  What they may think was a plan A choice was actually a plan B choice.  So we have chosen through the plan A process people to love and be loved by based on perhaps a faulty understanding of love.  Now what?  Well, we can choose plan A or plan B.  Plan B is my interpretation, understanding and application.  Plan A is God's interpretation, understanding and application.  God always chooses plan A for you and I. 
     Not long ago I was going on an errand that put me on the road for an hour each way.  Freeway traffic was probably going to influence what that time frame would actually be.  So, I weighed out my options.  I could take the Ford Expedition or the Mercedes Benz.  (both very used and not worth as much as the names imply).  One would give me comfort and the other would give me confidence that I would actually get there.  Plan A was to make the trip successfully.  Both ways.  Well, things go wrong as they sometimes will and one thing leading to another and I found myself on the side of the road with no gas because I had chosen to not get the car topped off with gas.  My plan B was "I think I can make the trip without spending the money on gas."  After waiting for AAA (plan A instituted long ago for just such an occasion) for an hour (timeline gone) and then pulling off the next exit for gas (more timeline gone), I was faced with a dilemma.  I had another plan A or plan B decision to make.  Continue on the trip or go home.  Both very reasonable.  I chose to call, change the time of the event and continue the trip.  Definitely a plan A decision. 
     Not everything is cut and wrapped in cute little packages with plan A or plan B written on top.  Some of the choices can be made by common sense.  Some of the choices can be made by common understanding.  Some of the choices can be made by common faith.  When all else fails, go to the instruction manual and find the answer that is best for a plan A choice.  For the Christian that would be the Bible. When we seek input from another person (Christian or not) subconsciously we will seek out that person whom we believe would most likely choose our choice in the first place.  However, once consulting with the Bible leads us to a clear answer outside mankind's wisdom.  The ten commandments is a good place to start.  The first 4 commands are specific to our relationship with God while the remaining 6 are specific to our relationship with others.  The Beatitudes are basically the ten commandments in reverse and show the result of our compliance with the ten commandments.  Making a choice based on Scripture will always be a plan A for the believer. 
     Today I chose to get out of bed, have a cup of coffee (actually 2) and write this blog.  All were plan A choices.  I'll be faced with man choices between A and B during my day.  The more I look for God to make the choice, the better I become at making those choices for myself and those around me.  Make your choice.  Plan A or plan B?  It's always your choice and so are the results.

A candle in the darkness.

     While for most of my life I've feared the light at the end of the tunnel to be a gorilla with a flashlight; a candle in the darkness has been the constant hope.  I have often missed the candle as I was so busy fending off the gorilla.  Maybe you can relate.  Events tend to grow to the over powering size before you can crack your knuckles!  What might start as a simple thing as running out of gas, the complexities of missed appointments, inconveniencing others, calling AAA and other events morph a small problem into a big one over a matter of minutes.  Suddenly the kids have to be picked up by a neighbor or friend or relative, dinner is definitely going to be late, and the whole evening has been thrown off.  You sit back in the seat of your car in 90 degree weather waiting for gas and let out an exhausting sigh.  What else could go wrong?  Triple A calls you back and says that the delivery of the gas will be delayed another hour due to an emergency.  Your husband/wife call to say that they are slammed at work and can't pick up he kids, groceries or other items on your long list of to do that won't get done.  Then your cell phone dies.  Still think there is no gorilla at the end of the tunnel?
     What we don't see because of the tunnel vision are all the small points of light...candles in the darkness.  You were in the slow lane of the freeway and had a safe place to pull over.  There were people you could call on to pick up the kids and keep them safe.  The car/truck was out of gas and not broken down (heaven knows you can't afford yet another bill).  The windows roll down!  Small candle but in the heat of the day any breeze at all will be welcome.  The kids have to skip a sports practice but do now have time to get their homework out of the way.  Plus they get to spend time with someone other than the usual "family".  You have money to fill the tank with gas when you do get going again.  A candle in the darkness can be a thousand little things overlooked because we cannot see outside the tunnel.  Don't forget the wife/husband who is working late as they are bringing in the income that allows all of the family to have a life to begin with.  You didn't have an elderly person or small child with you causing undue stress in the heat.  I could go on but I think you get the picture.
     I'm not saying we should be thankful for everything that goes on in our lives with the "everything happens for a reason" mentality.  I am saying that if we have a Shirley Temple attitude we will one day crash and burn because that attitude is not realistic.  Yet...there is a candle in the darkness.  When we have done all we can, when the world is done throwing everything at us that it can, when we have been let down in spite of all we have done, and when we feel like failures because of the things happening outside our control; then is when we need to look for the candle the most.  Jesus said that if we sought him we would find him.  The Bible is full of hope and encouragement that don't beckon the end of the world or the gorilla!  Sometimes it takes me a bit of downward spiral to get to the level where I'm knocked on my but and can only look up.  Even then, somehow, I manage to dig the hole a bit deeper with my focus on the gorilla instead of the candle.  Ever felt like that?
     Next time...we say...we will think, do, see or handle things differently.  Will we?  Not if we don't begin to look for the candles shining around us.  Besides God, there are friends, relatives, bosses, co-workers and many others who have been placed in our lives as candles.  If we spent less time blowing them out and more time sheltering them from the wind we wouldn't have time to focus on the gorilla.  You and I have been given today.  Not tomorrow or even the next day.  Today.  This moment and hour.  Not tomorrow or the next hour or moment.  My year has been full of events that did take me down a bit initially.  Then the people around me began to emerge as candles and even though my life is forever altered, the gorilla is smaller.  One day perhaps the gorilla will not be seen because the light of the many candles is so great.  Light a candle and defeat the darkness.

What's a guy/gal supposed to do?

     Ever have one of those moments when you know that regardless the action you choose; that action will be the wrong one in someone's eyes?  This is particularly true in relationships.  Sometimes there just doesn't seem to be a "right" choice.  Every choice seems to dig a deeper and deeper hole.  I've found a solution for this very event.  Isolate.  Become a hermit.  Shun any kind of relationship with man or woman.  This may not be realistic but it's the choice of many on a daily basis.  We become fake presenting fake interest, fake caring, and fake follow through.  It's a dilemma that has been around since the beginning of time.  Rather than take a stand and let the chips fall where they may, Eve ate the fruit.  Rather than take a stand and let the chips fall where they may, Adam ate the fruit.  Rather than take a stand and let the chips fall where they may, Steve chose a variety of sins to meet his perceived immediate need.  How about you?  Just what is a guy supposed to do? 
     It's difficult in this day and age to stand up for what is right.  With people lined up down the hall and around the corner just waiting to step into your job, you and I cave.  Carrying the baggage of a hurt past (even back to childhood) people carry their secrets and pretend that everything is fine...until they hit critical mass.  Just what are we supposed to do?  Doing the right thing is seldom popular but is always the right thing.  Doing the right thing will maybe put someone else out of work when you catch them cheating/stealing/etc...but it's always the right thing.  Being honest is important in our relationships.  Building relationships without disclosure begs for future problems.  Some would argue for maintaining some secrets.  Satan loves that!  He can use secrets for his good pleasure and our demise.  Telling the truth is often difficult but should never be impossible.  ALL of us have secrets.  No one is outside that category.  But whom do we have secrets from?  Certainly not God.
      It's a matter of character.  Letting your child win a game of Candy Land may help their ego but fails to teach them that losing is okay as well as long as you learn something.  Doing everything for your child, spouse, parent, friend, co-worker, enemy, and whomever is not the answer to the problem.  Many a person has burned out and fled every one of these categories.  Character demands we stand up, make the right choice, and not cave in to the way of the world.  This is not popular today outside of Christian circles.  Okay, it's not popular in many Christian circles as well.  Jesus showed what character is when he stood his ground all the way to the Cross. 
     I'm a guy if you hadn't noticed.  Guys don't show emotions or get mushy with other men (generally).  When two guys meet they may shake hands, nod the head (twice if you know them) and may even hug but with their hands clasped between their bodies.  Guys don't tell other guys that they love them (generally) and certainly don't cry.  What is a guy supposed to do?  I'll tell you about my brother and friend Steve.  Steve and I have known each other for quite a few years and through more than one troubling time in each of our lives.  Both of us will drop what we are doing for the other.  You know this kind of friendship.  He knows everything about me but wouldn't think of throwing it in my face.  He knows my flaws and helps me improve because it's the right thing to do.  One day while visiting Steve we were talking and I felt the urge to say something.  I told Steve, "I love you."  After a short shocked silence (we were both shocked) he told me the same thing.  Steve and I are both heterosexual and in relationships.  The love we have is like David did for Jonathan.  Brothers from different mothers.  It was the right thing go do.
     What's a guy/gal supposed to do?  The right thing...always.

Sometimes good isn't good enough.

     When I was a teenager I went to test for my drivers license.  You need to understand that I had been driving for several years already as most farm boys did in the Midwest.  I drove to the testing site and took the written test which I passed.  I went on the driving test and flunked.  I flunked!  I was devastated and shocked.  Returning home (yep, driving myself), I had to think long and hard about not doing good enough to pass the test for something I was already doing.  I waited a month (all the while driving because that's what you do on the farm) and retook the driving test and passed.  Now this may have been embarrassing but it wasn't.  It may have been hilarious but that wasn't the point either.  The event was a marked time in my life when my good wasn't good enough.  Ever have a time in your life like this?  You try and do your "best" and it's not good enough? 
     Jesus says there is no one "good."  He also says that no one can be good enough to enter Heaven.  Jesus said HIS "good enough" was necessary for us to be able to reach Heaven.  People are different though.  William James said, "We may have a God in Heaven who forgives us our sins but mankind does not."  People strive to be good enough.  When they can't be good enough they surround themselves with people slightly below their level of "not good enough."  They may be the salutatorian under the valedictorian.  They may be the girl who wasn't good enough for the cheer leading squad but is good enough to run errands for those who did.  The team manager may have been able to play but wasn't chosen as good enough for the team.  So and so received that promotion that I should have received if only I had been good enough.  The list of examples goes on and on.  In the end, it's our self image that is blown apart.
     When God created the world and all that was in it he rested and said that it was "good (enough)" and then rested.  His creation, man, made a decision that forever resigned himself to the "not good enough" category.  We've been fighting that curse ever since.  Try as we might, we will never be good enough to save ourselves.  We will never be good enough to exceed our expectations of ourselves.  We will never be able to be sin free for even one day.  We are on our own not good nor are we good enough.  That's why we need Christ who was good and good enough.  He satisfied the payment for the forgiveness we need for not being good enough. 
     As I take a quick inventory of my 62 years on earth, I am overwhelmed at my not good enough list.  Yet, there it is for all to see.  A simple google search or a read of my book will show that others are aware that I'm not good enough either.  So, how do we co-exist with each other if all of us are not good enough?  We can't make anyone good enough just as they cannot make us good enough.  Paul tells us that there was nothing good in him.  That's true about me as well.  Maybe about you too.  There is nothing good in me.  However, that's only part of the story.  As I stated above I returned and passed the test.  The fact is that there is something not only good but good enough in me.  It's not something I bought in the store; nor is it something I worked for.  What I have in me is Christ who is good enough.  He meets the standard and becomes my good enough forgiving all my failures that were not good enough. 
     I/we do good things, have good thoughts, and create good in our world.  What good is there in you?

A time to let go...

     In order to "let go" there, by implication, must have been an "attachment" of some sorts somewhere.  We become attached to so many different people, pets, things and even our own selves.  Last Friday my dog Buddy was no longer able to get up.  He was 12 and had lived a good life.  His love for people was immense and his idiosyncrasies were many.  We first found Buddy when he was about 2 at a grocery store while on vacation.  We found his picture anyway.  We met him and immediately fell in love with the over stimulated and excited animal.  The first attachment.  There were to be many more attachments over the next 10 plus years.  With each new attachment there was a need to let an old one be replaced.  That's the way it is with us.  There is a difference with our human attachments but there are attachments there as well.  I have 7 children.  Each I have an attachment with.  I love them.  They are unique individuals and successful.  During their growing years I was required to train them, encourage them, lead them and be an example to them.  All of that so that I could, over those same years, let go of attachments they no longer needed.  Neither did I.
     The Bible talks about putting away the old things for the new.  There are steps to climb in your and my faith that require attachments and the ability to let go.  We, like babies, need milk to begin our lives.  We need transition food to grow and mature and as adults are requiring food of substance in order to do what we are to do.  I've come to realize that with all the growth we do have in our Spiritual lives, others may not recognize that growth in me.  That doesn't mean that growth hasn't taken place.  So, to whom does the kudos go for seeing that growth; that attachment and letting go that leads to maturity?  The Bible says that God is aware of every thought, deed and action before we were ever born.  He created us in our mothers womb and developed every aspect of who we are.  I know what you may be thinking.  What about the impaired, disabled, and infirm infants.  Well, that's where the attachment becomes an important issue.  We are capable of giving to those like us.  We need to be capable of giving to all.  That includes attachment.  Enjoying God's creation in each other is a good thing no matter the details.
     Buddy was in a lot of pain these last few months to a year.  Medication helped for a while and so did changing our routines.  Walks became slower, sleeping increased, and the glimmer of youth in his eyes changed with his age.  That's the way it happens to us as well.  We get old.  Sometimes life is gracious to us and we actually are blessed to be able to live a long life.  Long life is denied to so many.  Just where is our thankfulness?  Somewhere along the line our lives hit an intersection where we were confronted with cross traffic.  That cross traffic caused us to ponder areas of our life we had previously not been able to understand.  When I was first told about Jesus I was a teenager who knew everything.  Anyone smiling?  As an adult when I met Jesus I was ready for the intersection.  I changed and so did most everything in my world.  Except my appetite for really good food!  There was the "letting go" of "attachments" and the new improved updated version put in place. 
     It's obvious to those who know me that my life hasn't always rung true of the knowledge that I have.  I've, like you, failed to do what I should have done and have done what I should not have done.  I've caused grief for others as well as happiness.  I could have let all those wrong choices take hold of my life.  But, God in all his grace has made a way for me to let go of bad attachments and I have taken advantage of that grace many times.  People have come and gone in my life even as I have come and gone in theirs.  Sometimes it's been my choice and sometimes not.  However, the story of my life and yours has continued on.  Buddy was put to sleep in the most of humane ways at 6 PM on Friday evening and buried by the garden where he can survey his kingdom.  This is an attachment that is difficult to let go of.  Other deaths of family and friends has been equally or more difficult as well.  We don't want those in our lives to go away.  But they, as we, must one day.  Being able to let go of Jesus, the disciples knew that they would go through the transition to being the men of God that Jesus had taught them to be.  That's the key!  Knowing what Buddy has taught me is important in the letting go.  My memories will forever be attachments that I won't let go.

Sometimes it's best to just listen and then listen again.

     Listening is rapidly becoming a lost art in society.  People hear each other as they give or take orders, yell, scream and share life's intimate moments.  Hearing doesn't involve any actual connection.  It's like I hear a person say "Hi" or "How are you?" to me and I hear it.  I even answer with my own "Hi" or "How are you?" Did he hear me or listen to me?  I heard him but I didn't listen to him.  Several years ago in downtown Seattle I asked a strange walking the opposite direction this very question.  He stopped (first sign) and said, "Do you really care about how I am?"  I stopped and said, "Yes." though at the time I didn't really.  He knew that.  I stayed engaged for a few moments before he said, "Don't say it unless you mean it!"  He then walked away.  Do I wish I could redo that moment?  Yes.  So, now I do that moment different when I see someone or hear them ask the question.  Do I want to be someone who hears or someone who listens?  The latter for sure.
     Sometimes we hear the question but fail to hear the message.  Peter was such an example.  He had betrayed Jesus 3 times prior to Jesus' death.  After the resurrection Jesus met Peter and said to him, "Peter, do you love me?"  Peter responded "Yes Lord, you know that I love you."  Jesus said, "Then feed my sheep."   After this exchange had taken place twice Peter answered, "Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you."  Jesus tells him to feed his sheep and his future ending the conversation the way he had begun with Peter, "Follow me."  Peter finally listened.  It was about Jesus and bringing people to Jesus out of pure motive of love.  Why did it take so long for Peter to listen to Jesus?  Because, like us, he had been taught to hear but not to listen.  Hearing requires the ears but listening requires the heart, soul and mind. 
     "You never listen to me!" That phrase can come from any age person.  What comes to mind most is the parent vs teen conversations.  While conversations describe an exchange of words; there is more to the word.  Conversation is a word that requires interaction.  While I can talk to the voices in my head, that's different.  My exchange between God and I, my family and I, my friends/co-workers and I, and my enemies and I should all be conversations directed by and initiated by the Holy Spirit.  In this way, we glorify God and feed His sheep.  Sheep aren't smart.  Sometimes neither am I.  We need something to get our attention in order for us to transform from "hearers" to "listeners".  There needs to be this transformation in order to first be able to hear God's voice and then to listen to what e says to us.  The same is true for our conversations with others.  We must be able to first "hear" what they say.  Then we must "listen" to what they are really saying. 
     It's been said that we shouldn't ask questions about what we already know and we shouldn't ask questions about what we don't want to know.  I know that strangers, for the most part, don't want to answer the question I posed in the start of this blog.  I know that strangers will and do want us to listen to them.  Once we hear God we are left with the listening.  Listening to God is so much better than me listening to myself.  When God is silent, I should be as well.  That is still listening to His voice.  Sometimes there are no words that can or should be spoken.  It's time to listen and be silent.  Silence doesn't mean we don't care.  We are there because we care.  Silence is in some sense an agreement that this is where the conversation stops and the empathy begins.  Just for this moment and just for this hour and day I will try to listen and not just hear.  How about you?

My particular kind of crazy!

     When my kids were little, once in the car, they would ask me where we were going.  I'd tell them we were going to "Crazy."  This happened practically every time we were in the car.  The end result is when asked by others where we had been; they would say "Crazy!"  You will know the truth and it shall set you free.  Crazy isn't bad.  Crazy isn't always good either.  Crazy is what we make it.  We can use crazy to be funny, angry, sad, depressed, elated and a host of other feelings.  We even tell someone we are crazy about them.  I say that about my truck.  Isn't that crazy?  "That Steve sure has done some crazy things!"  "I wonder if Steve knows that he's crazy?"  "Steve is crazy about Harley Davidson's Fat Boy."  The list could go on and on.  You get the drift though.  It's crazy good!
     I'm crazy about Jesus even though my life sometimes doesn't show that craziness.  The prophets of the Old Testament were crazy about Jesus and his coming.  John the Baptizer was crazy about Jesus while he was yet in his mother's womb.  The Bible tells us that John (yet unborn) and Jesus (yet unborn) jumped for joy when their mother's met.  Now that's crazy.  Things in the Bible haven't always been good crazy.  Noah was called crazy before the flood.  No one was left to call him crazy later.  David danced in his underwear while entering the city and people thought he was crazy.  The families of the 12 disciples must have thought their kids were crazy to simply leave everything when Jesus told them to follow him.  Then there is that crazy book, Revelation.  Things are going to get crazy bad in a short time and that's not good for lots of people.
     We tend to avoid being the one to tell a friend about Jesus for fear of being labeled crazy or Bible thumper, or worse.  Because of our fear of being crazy for Jesus many souls will spend eternity in Hell.  Now that is crazy.  Because of my fear of how people see me I don't share the Gospel?  When I can tell a guy that his fly is open in pubic but avoid telling others about the saving grace of Jesus I must be crazy.  Where crazy was once relegated to the mentally ill, it now covers practically every area of our lives.  Being crazy doesn't carry the weight it once does.  So why don't we tell others about Jesus?  Maybe it's because we aren't crazy about Jesus ourselves. 
     I have PTSD.  It's a crazy mental disorder that has left me with no way to get away from its power.  PTSD so invades my life and permeates every corner of my daily life that I cannot get away from it.  Why isn't that true regarding Jesus for you? For the Christians living around us?  For the pastors of churches?  Just where are the crazy people of God who will do crazy things for God and will risk everything just so someone will hear about Jesus.  While I have PTSD, my witness is still intact.  We all fall short of God's glory by many different means.  This shouldn't be a means of letting ourselves off the hook but rather should be a means by which we can as HUMANS reach out to others who like us are not perfect. 
     My challenge for myself is to remain in Christ regardless what the world thinks.  Do you think that's crazy?