Sometimes when you least expect it, good triumphs over bad. Likewise with love. However, there is a cost to anyone who desires to love and be loved. With so much of our language beaten down to mean so much less than originally intended, it's important that we speak plainly and directly. Having said that I will attempt to put some insight into love. It's not just love for someone but also a love of life itself and those who tread the path with us. Some will stay on the path with us while others will drift off due to their own desires or just a different path.
First and foremost love in a very precious gift that should be openly defended and adhered to. I'm not talking about our love of grilled cheese (though they are great with a bit of bacon) or our pets and such. I'm talking about "love" that is the core of life. This love cannot be brought up in us on a whim. This love was there at the founding of the world and the creation of mankind. This love is so special that there is nothing we can do to earn or buy it. In fact, so few have this love that some wonder if it actually exists anymore. Yes, it does.
About 20 years ago I was wrestling with what love was/is and how it works. I had been struggling with this one word for 40 years at the time. By the way, I still cannot grasp the depth and height of love nor its width. Anyone who says they can obviously has a problem telling the truth. We may, as humans, scratch the surface but we will never (yes an absolute!) be able to fully understand the love of God that has been bestowed to us. That being said, we should not be dissuaded and turn away from this most precious of gems.
I should back up for a moment though and tell you about the journey of learning what love is. While I was growing up (on the farm in North Dakota) all of my definitions to words were developed regardless of their accuracy or not. Love just happened to be one word and one feeling that was badly skewed because of abuse. God doesn't give up easily though and has persuaded me in my walk. At age 20 I had my first real brush with reality. My best friend was killed in a traffic accident. "Devastated" doesn't even begin to scratch the surface of my feelings. Ronnie was a part of me. His absence was responsible for part of my heart being torn out and taken away from me. I had up until then not experienced "loss" and it wouldn't be my first time. It's here at that starting point that I began my quest to understand me.
Years later at age 37 I would again find myself with a dilemma on the table. That dilemma was me. I was in therapy trying to get some sort of box for my life. By the way, there is no box! Looking at definitions in my life, I realized that I had been lied to, misinformed, deceived or whatever word you would find to describe how duped I felt. How many had tried to honestly love me with a love I couldn't even fathom? I don't know. What I did know was that my "love" wasn't anything like what God presented. Letting go is setting free; or so it goes. How do you let go of an idea? It's not like you can replace an idea with another idea. No one can.
So, I began my transformation with the help of God and my counselor. I used Jesus' example as a "perfect" definition. The ultimate "love" definition. What made the love of God so different? Was it the way it was presented? Was it the way it was personified? Was it the way, the truth and the light? Yep. That was it. Love from God is the way, truth and the light. Love was manifested in Jesus' life, death and resurrection. What was the key that held this love in such high esteem? I knew if I could discover the key that my quest would be over.
This is my discovery! Love (true and perfect) is unselfishness. That was it. Unselfishness. Okay, then there is the application. This is key. Mankind is unable to give away that which they did not have. We're still that way. The application of this "love" is the easiest and the most difficult task I've ever faced. Why? Because it can only be expressed with NO expectations of its return. How often do we give of ourselves with no expectation of anything in return? Not very often. This brings up the second part of love. We are to try to love. We're not perfect, will never be perfect and shouldn't expect anything in return to our love given. When we think of the Cross of Christ there is nothing given in return to the love delivered into our hands and hearts.
Here is the last key element. Only those who have been hurt deeply are capable and able to love deeply. I don't think we need to go out and seek that which will hurt us. There is no truth in that. What we are able to do is simple. We must TRY. That's it. We must try to pass on the love of God by being Christ to the world. Our "hurt" is nothing compared to the death of Jesus on the cross. Our "trying" should only focus on today. We can do nothing about yesterday. We can do nothing about tomorrow. We only have now. Today. This moment.
It's a difficult discipline (I have failed more than succeeded). Loving should be the intentional act of the heart of Jesus to us. Remember we cannot give away that which we don't have. We have forgiveness. However, we don't deserve it. We have sanctification. Though we don't know where we are going. What we have is this moment. Don't get bound by yesterday or the fear of tomorrow. They can take care of themselves. What you will find when you are able to practice loving is peace. You will know that you delivered the love of God and that was your only mission. Loving someone else as Jesus loves them. I still don't have as much success as I'd like and far short of what Christ would like me to have.
Notice there is no mention of what we get. That's because we have already received it. We have already been blessed at the time of our surrender to Jesus. We have all our needs taken care of. He says so in the Bible. Jesus also told us to not expect anything from mankind. Because they may not be able to give what we need. So, Godly loving is the best. What do we do then? live life with the love of God foremost in our lives. We don't look back (regrets) and we don't live for tomorrow (unrealistic expectations). We live life for today. We love for today. We act for today. Our spoken words are for today.
Just was Jesus took the ultimate "hurt", we can have confidence that someone has already tread upon this path for us. So, when we give away the love of Christ with no expectation of the return of love; we are ahead of the game. Why? Because it's not a game and there is no competition. It is not I but Christ who lives within me. To live is Christ, to die is gain. That's what Paul says in the Bible. He's spot on. The way of the world is, as I might say, not my monkey! Love freely!
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