Why we don't do what we should do and do what we should not do.

     The short answer to this statement is that we have free will and can exercise that free will in any way we wish.  That would make a very short blog.  The dilemma we face is not that we do and not do what we should; but rather why we place ourselves in these situations in the first place.  I want to state right up front that I, like Paul, am the greatest of sinners.  That being said, like Paul, I am forgiven by the grace of God brought to me through the death, burial and resurrection of Jesus Christ the Son of God.  Because of this I recognize that there is nothing good inside of me save the grace of Jesus.  Without the grace of God, I would be dead spiritually and bankrupt in all other areas of my life.  All of this thanks to my free will and choices that I either do or do not make.
     "Why?"  This is such a short question that hasn't left our lips from our first ability to speak until this very day.  We live as Christians in a very split world.  On the one side are all those choices that show we belong to Jesus.  On the other side are all those choices that show we still belong to the world.  Why choose one or the other?  Are all choices based on the world we live in wrong or bad?  Do all the choices we make for Christ really show the world that we belong to Him?  There are lots of good people who claim to be Christian who, like me, sin more often than not.  Remembering we are not perfect; we are unable to live a day sin free.  Thus when we encounter a situation the real question is whether or not we choose to sin.  If we make the choice to sin, the input was from he world.  If we choose to do the righteous thing, the input was from the Lord.  We all know this to be true.  Yet, day in and day out we do that which we shouldn't do and do not do that which we should. 
     Robert Schuler once said in an interview that he didn't use the word "sin" because everyone already knew they were one and didn't need to be reminded of such a negative concept.  Psychologists and philosophers have pushed the envelope for centuries justifying all of our choices both good and bad.  We look around us and see people who are worse than we are and we congratulate ourselves on being such good people.  Slowly the mandate of Christ's setting of the first church has been eroding away to the point where "bad" is "good" and "good" is bad.  It's important that we share the gospel to and with all people.  However, when all is said and done, it's more important that we let Christ live his life through our surrendered lives.  Most people don't live life as if Christ is the center of their lives.  They, instead, let Jesus have the back seat and only ask him after arriving at the destination of their choosing if this is where he wanted them to go.  Why?  Because we don't really want to do what it is we should do and really want to do that which we are to not do. 
     Part of the choice we make in our free will entails what we consider our loses versus what Christ gains.  Peer pressure, the need to retain a job, keeping relationships with friends, being accepted as a viable part of our family, group, church are all reasons why we deny Christ those parts of our lives.  We simply do not believe that God can really take care of us if we really do what Christ wants us to do.  In fact, we have ceased to listen to God as a Christian (sic) group and as a Christian (sic) individual.  To do so simply costs us too much of our free will which in turn aids in the nature of the beast.  The beast as in the one who goes about the earth seeking whom he may devour.  The god of this world, Satan, wants you to do just what the title says.  We deserve to have our free choice and deserve to make our choice based on our thinking.  We also deserve to go to hell if we do not choose Jesus.  When we do not do what we should do we deny Christ the opportunity to work through our surrendered lives and change people.  Is that what we really want?  Is the focus and goal of Jesus Christ ours as well? 

Are we supposed to have egos?

     We are told that our children need positive reinforcement and praise.  So we do that...well most of us do.  We are told that we need to give our employees positive reinforcement and praise.  Again, we do that...well most of us do.  We are told that for our marriages and other relationships to work we need to provide positive reinforcement and praise.  In fact, there are many other examples where positive reinforcement and praise are needed and welcomed.  The Bible tells us to build up one another exhorting each other in the faith and hope of Jesus' return.  Should we only do the positive reinforcement and praise we may create ego problems.  Having a balance between our positive reinforcement and praise versus discipline and correction is essential to maintain an ego that is reflective of who God has created us to be. 
     Paul says several times that he needed to "die to self" in order that Christ may live through him.  He also said that it was his very sin that prevented the flow of the Holy Spirit in the work God had given him.  Paul goes on to say that we, despite our thoughts and feelings, need to run the race and finish to the goal in order to receive the prize waiting for us.  All of this requires balance that mankind doesn't know how to manage.  We may be good at this or that while bad at other this or that.  Many times we, humans, utilize our positive and good to encourage others to overlook the bad or negative.  When we find that this works to hide the one, we have crossed the line and our worldly ego has taken over.  Where Paul's ego was in Christ, he recognized that "except for the grace of God, there go I."  The process by which our egos come under the control of God is difficult as the world (even the Christian world) has sought to feed the ego at every turn.  When brought to fruition, the ego creates a world where we become ineffective Christians.
     I'm not saying we shouldn't receive praise or even that we shouldn't have good self esteem.  What I am saying is that we either belong to Jesus and are directed by the Holy Spirit or we belong to whatever part of us that we haven't surrendered to Jesus.  Janus Joplin once sang, "Oh Lord won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz?  My friends all drive Porsche's and I must make amends."  Clearly asking God to define who you are by the car you drive and the crowd you hang with isn't God's idea of who you are.  The words of the old song "Just As I Am" are closer to what God wants from us.  So, whether my ego is stroked by the world or by God my dedication to the work He has put before me either is ignored or prosperous.  Should I have the ego that puts me first or best or most honored; I have nothing at all.  The world may sing the praises of actors, actresses, athletes, and other professionals to it's own demise.  Those who are Christian or call themselves Christian should either put up or shut up.  The same is true for you and I.  Either we are Christ's or we are not.  If we pretend that we are Christ's while living for the world we are self-deceived and lost before we begin.
     Whether your pride is fueled by Jesus or the life you live there will be a judgment when we are before the throne of God.  The Bible says that "pride comes before the fall."  I know it's true for me as I've left a trail of wreckage through the past 40+ years.  God has certainly taken what I've done and not done (like Paul) and brought good out of it or will do so down the road.  Are your children, grandchildren, trophy husband or wife, career, money, possessions or activities defining who and what you are?  Do the words of family, employer, or peers mean more than the reassuring words of Jesus?  Will you stake who and what you are TODAY to garner your place in Heaven?  If there is any question in your mind with these questions; you need to seek the throne of God.  After you have come before the throne of God, surrender and let the God of love take his seat on the throne of your life.  Let his glory shine instead of yours.  Your life and the lives of those around you will change with this surrender. 
     Paul (again) says that all he boasts in is Christ, died, buried and risen for us.

Spiritual bullies

     The first spiritual bully was thrown from heaven along with 1/4 of the angels because they were bullies.  They wanted what they didn't deserve and didn't have.  Bullying has become a hot topic in the last few years but as you can see is a practice from the beginning of time.  No, God did not create bullies.  He doesn't today either.  Bullies are selfish and self centered thinking of no one other than themselves.  They even bully other bullies in order to have dominance.  Very seldom does anyone ever do something about bullies.  Within the news recently we have seen several student suicides (one was 12) because of bullying.  Spiritual bullying is more common that we care to examine or admit.  Why?  Because it makes us take a look at ourselves.  We, by nature, don't want to take a look at ourselves.  We are fully aware of "those people's sin" and can quote chapter and verse where they have gone wrong.  But to look at ourselves through that same lens is contrary to who we are.  So, the Word tells us that the Devil roams the earth (his domain) seeking whom he can devour.  In our spiritual bullying we aid him in his conquest of those we bully.
     It's no surprise to read in the Word that Satan is the father of lies.  He lies from the beginning when trying to bring down Eve and then Adam.  He succeeded.  Temptation has been a thorn in mankind's flesh ever since.  Temptation is all around us.  It doesn't matter what the temptation as there are plenty to go around.  I have my temptations and you have yours.  No one is immune to the wiles of Satan.  When we go down, like Eve, we want to take someone with us.  So, the obvious choice is someone close to us.  Misery loves company as the saying goes.  The beginnings of bullying are found here; at this moment.  We cajole, coerce, convince, and command others to be with us in our sin.  When the have complied they are like us, fallen.  Once one person has fallen we move onto someone else.  This continues until by one means or another we are stopped.  If it's not the spirit of God stopping us, perhaps it's our death.  Temptation, when surrendered to, becomes a reason to be defensive.  Being defensive is one trait Jesus never engaged in while on here on earth or in heaven.  We, on the other hand, have been a defensive people since our fall.
     Defensiveness is not something that God designed into the humans in his likeness.  The one who is in Christ should never be found defensive.  Okay, maybe sometimes but that should be dealt with in prayer and confession before moving forward.  The effects of defensiveness can be seen in our myriad of religious denominations.  I didn't say Christian because many of them are not.  What has happened over time since the early church?  There have been so many church splits and church start ups over various issues that we are overwhelmed at the volume of issues.  One church in Minnesota split because they argued over what color to paint the downstairs bathroom!  Satan had a hay day in that church!  Being unwilling to drop our defensiveness makes us rigid and unwilling to consider another's point of view.  Hmmm...that sounds a lot like bullying.  Demanding your own way is bullying.  Demanding that others bend to your way of thinking, living or believing is bullying.  Bullying is sinning. 
     When we are aware of our fallen nature, we tend to beat ourselves up and put ourselves down.  We in essence bully ourselves.  What does this accomplish?  This behavior takes our eyes off Jesus who has no condemnation for the believer and submits to the condemning wants of the great deceiver, Satan.  This self degradation is continued and prorogated from generation to generation.  Constant messages from family, friends and the world tell us what a fallen person we are.  Forgiveness seems so empty so despair sets in.  Once despair has worked it's work, our Christian witness is ineffective and empty.  Satan has a plan to take you and I down.  It's our choice whether we go along with the plan or not.  We have the choice day in and day out.  Moment by moment we need to surrender all areas of our lives to Jesus who is the author and FINISHER of our faith.  It is He who will complete the good work in us if we would only get out of the way and let him.  The bully in us wants to keep us captive while the grace of Jesus wants to set us free.  It's always my choice.

Be careful of what you wish for!

     Yesterday I talked about my dislike of spiders.  Their place on earth isn't questionable but is interesting.  They eat flying insects and crawling insects.  Wishing spiders didn't exist may be a comforting thought for me but it would be selfish.  That wish would also create some problems in nature.  I once read that if no flies died for 24 hours that flies would cover the earth 3 feet deep.  I haven't been able to verify that alleged fact.  However, the implications are clear.  We don't want that many flies anywhere.  Thank you spiders!  I still don't like them.  Wishing their demise isn't a good thing. 
     Wishing I had a million dollars is or has been on the lips of perhaps every adult on earth.  I have wished that many times.  So, what if you did get the one million dollars?  What was it you wanted it for in the first place?  Most likely, like me, it was for something pleasurable either for myself or for someone that I care about.  In today's economy the figure should be at least ten million dollars with inflation where it is.  James tells us that "we ask and have not because we ask with wrong motives."  Well that describes me!  It's not that God doesn't want us to have the money.  It's that God knows the motives of our hearts.  Like with the spiders, money has it's place when used for God's purpose.  A new Hummer is no God's purpose.  A new Hummer shipped to a missionary in a mountainous region is God's purpose.  Well, most likely anyway.
     There are any number of times that we have wished ill to those we know.  Usually that person or group is or are people who are tormenting us, abusing us, hurting us or otherwise attacking who we are.  Many a person has wished someone dead and when they die felt guilty for the rest of their lives for their wish.  Jesus said that if we even think of harming someone we are already guilty of the crime.  So, I guess I should have spent a few years in prison.  Fortunately, I haven't been judged in that fashion.  The prison that we are put in is of our own making.  Prisoner to our thoughts and the compulsion to even the score.  In our haste for justice, we don't consider that justice will be there for us, those wishing ill, as well.  We have a problem in our world with making ill come true.  Our children are programed by video games, the news, gang affiliation, or even parents who are in jail for violent crimes.  Be careful of what you wish for.
     Wishing the return of Jesus doesn't sound like a bad thing.  However, for the non-believer this is a bad thing.  We, Christians, do wish for Jesus to return or to take us home.  We are seeking a selfish end to our life here on planet earth.  But what about our neighbor, child, friend, enemy, family or even whole nations?  With the return of Jesus those in Christ will be taken to heaven.  Those who do not believe will be left here to deal with reality.  Those who profess Christ as Savior will be killed for their faith and so enter heaven.  ALL those who do not know Christ (according to Revelations 20) will spend eternity in hell as their names aren't written in the Book of Life.  Wishing those people around us to know Jesus is great.  Praying for them and talking with them about salvation and the grace of God is great.  Knowing their names are written in the Book of Life is a wish come true.
     Wishing for the past to be altered so that we don't make THAT mistake is futile.  It's not going to happen.  This moment is gone just as quickly as it came.  We cannot change that which we is past.  We can deal with it, learn from it, and not repeat it though.  Revelation 20 also states that we will be judged by our works.  If that is true (and it is) then I'm going to be quite embarrassed when I am judged.  Perhaps you will be also?  Approaching the throne of God is only possible because God wishes us to be saved.  That's what the Bible says.  God wishes that our needs be met and that we care for the souls of those around us.  What would happen if we, God's people, only wished for what God's will is?  Jesus wishes that I would die to self and let him live through me.  That's what I wish for today for myself and for you.

I don't like spiders at all!

     Okay, I absolutely HATE spiders.  They have their function as part of nature.  The flies and other bugs their webs catch keep them nourished and us with less bugs.  They don't belong in my house, car, shop, or other buildings.  They certainly don't belong on me.  At one point in my life I as so afraid of spiders that my wife had to kill them for me as they terrified me so much.  I grew up on a Midwest farm and there were spiders all over the place.  They ranged from tiny to huge.  I didn't like any of them.  The only good spider was a dead spider became my mantra.  Then I found out that there were people who actually liked spiders!  They would hold them, talk with them, usher them outside so that they could go on with their spider lives.  I couldn't believe it!  Watching a National Geographic documentary (I should have skipped this one) I learned that in some countries spiders were eaten as part of the people's diet.  They certainly have taken this way to far.  Even though God showed Paul that all living creatures were okay to eat, I believe there were no spiders on the menu.
     I feel passionate about my hate of spiders.  I am focused and very clear on my boundaries.  I even bought these plug in ultrasonic devices that rid your room, home, garage of bugs.  They work wonderfully!  I'm at a place in my recovery where I can kill small spiders.  However, the bigger the spider, the more I look to my wife or others to kill the spider.  Then they catch it and release it outside.  At least it's gone.  I once read that unaware we swallow several spiders over time during our sleep.  I now sleep with my mouth closed.  Yuck!  My dog will catch and kill spiders but only inside the house.  This leads me to an affirmation of my belief that spiders do not belong in the house.  Some things are just that way.  Spiders are tenacious.  I hate walking into a spider web that I didn't see!  Puts me in a state of panic as I claw to get the web off me.  Then for the next few hours I feel phantom spiders crawling on me. 
     Now I know there are "harmless" and "harmful" spiders.  I don't always take the time to note which one is crawling towards me.  To me they are all harmful.  Okay, I'm prejudice!  With that in mind, it's clear we live in different worlds.  Mine is one where I think pests don't belong where I am.  When I compare this obsession with other areas of my life; there is quite the discrepancy.  Chocolate isn't good for me.  Yet, there it is hiding in my pantry waiting for the moment to jump on me and firmly attach itself onto my love handles.  There are "goodies" reserved for the kids that tend to be more of a temptation than I can bear.  Even though I try to be diligent about what takes place in my life I often miss the basic and major elements in and for my life. 
     Why don't I have the same focus and intensity with reading the Bible?  How about applying that focus on my Christian witness?  Why not be more disciplined with what I let into my life.  Just why do I feel that my spiritual state doesn't require the same fixation as I have for my hate of spiders?  These are great questions and need to be asked.  However, after asking, the questions still must be answered.  Do I hold back on my Christian witness because of fear?  How about my prayer life?  Do I shove it aside so that I can have the chocolate?  Then there is the lack of discipline in my physical life both with my weight and my exercise.  What does my Christian life tell others about Christ?  Am I to believe that God wants me to feel as focused and intense in my Christian life as I am with my fear of spiders?  Yes, God wants me to be fixated on Him and Jesus.  When I fix my eyes on Jesus there is no mistaking what God wants from and for my life.  How about you?  Do you feel intensely the love of God?  Do you share that love of God.  Christianity isn't supposed to be a solitary living experience. 

What really captivates the Christian heart?

     In the book of Revelation Christ urges one of the seven churches to "return to your first love."  That would be the love they felt and experienced that first day, month, year that they first fell in love with Jesus realizing what He has done for us through his display of love on the cross.  It would be the kind of love that denies all of our "self" while absorbing as much of Him as we can.  That first love would not only be the first time encountering the love of God, but also feeling that love as we pass it onto others.  The "return" part of the statement is the concerning part of the quote.  If we are to return to our first love, we must have walked away from that first love as well.  It doesn't matter if we walked away one foot or 10,000 miles.  The fact is we walked away much like Adam and Eve did in the garden when they chose self over the love of God.  That's what we do isn't it.  We choose self over the love of God not only for ourselves but also those we give our love to.
     I remember several times driving down the road and glancing at my gas gauge noticing that I was sitting on empty.  No gas station in sight, appointment that I needed to get to, someone waiting at that location or other intention of mine.  So, I did the usual; "God, if you get me to _____, I'll _____."  Have you ever done that.  After I reached my destination and or filled the truck with gas, I'd go right back to whatever I was doing.  I even used the prayer to keep myself from getting tickets when I was speeding to get to a gas station to get gas!  How crazy is that?!  Never mind that this has also been applied to other areas of my life as well.  My promises to God would soon be compromised as I realized that no negative consequence that I could see was going to take place or had been visited upon me.  Needless to say, my first love wasn't God.  Nor was my circumstance enough to bring me to the point of being "captivated" to seek that first love.  The fervor had ceased to be and contentment in my life had taken place.
     The first century  church was anxiously awaiting the return of Christ they hoped and prayed would take place in their lifetimes.  That event didn't then and hasn't even now.  As time passes, people tend to lose belief in the promise.  When we begin to not believe that Jesus is coming back for us this very day, we start believing that we have all the time in the world.  We engage complacent Christianity and endure churchology.  Okay, that's my word for maintaining the status quo in our churches.  We have calendars planned out for everything from the church softball games to the potluck on the 4th of July.  There is attention given to the budget and cleaning of the church windows without a single person looking across the street at the ignored mission field.  There is no first love evident.  They and we have walked away from the first love and made ourselves and our idols the first love instead. 
     Hal Lindsay said once that the church organization has become a "doctrine of demons".  By that he focused on what man interpreted as the "needed" order of the church versus the outpouring of the love of God.  Now God had to fit into man's box and man no longer sought to be what God envisioned we be in Christ.  So we begin to water down the gospel, up the "tolerance" of others and their beliefs over the solid commands of Scripture.  The Bible talks about mankind seeking what they want to hear with "itching ears."  We do not do this and do that while both ends of that spectrum are nothing more than the sin that takes us further from our love of Christ.  The Christian heart is more and more difficult as the complacency rather than captivation increases.  In the end, God (again in Revelation) tells the people then and today that because we are lukewarm He will spew us out of his mouth.  He will throw up! We will be the throw up! 
     What really captivates the Christian heart?  The realization that all we are, all we have and this day are all gifts from God and we are nothing without him.  Just as our love of our spouses, children, parents and friends captivates us to act and be in a loving space to maintain and grow our relationship, we need to do so even more with Christ.  What will you do to be captivated by the love of Christ so that you see nothing but Him and what He wants in your life?

Living with absolutes

     It's been said that there are 2 absolutes in life.  They are taxes and death.  Everyone pays taxes and everyone dies.  Both have variables that alter when, how and where they take place.  However, the two will happen absolutely!  Sometimes people think there are other absolutes in life.  Like, "You are absolutely wrong."  I may be wrong but not absolutely!  When we think of our kids, they "are absolutely the best!"  Maybe and maybe not.  Then, we also have the "perfect" absolutes like, "I love my job, it's perfect for me."  Maybe today it seems like it is.  What happens later in the day, next week or a year for now.  A true test of absolutes is they don't change with time or events.  Inclusiveness comes into play as well.  For instance, "I love to garden."  Okay, I do love to garden in some ways.  I don't love to pull weeds, kill bugs, or any of the dirty work.  Absolutes come in many presentations even if they aren't absolutes.  I'd like to suggest another absolute.  Jesus is absolutely wanting you to come to know him personally.  No conditions, no pressure, and it's your choice.  The offer is absolute.  Jesus wants to absolutely bless you...no strings attached.  Jesus wants absolutely wants us to spend eternity with him in heaven.  Yep, absolutely.  In the meantime we still need to deal with taxes and death.
     When we use words like "absolute" we bring up expectations and conditions in our world.  The conditions seem to follow the depth of desire to be held to those conditions by others.  Definitions of what those conditions are differ from individual to individual.  See, even words don't mean anything absolutely perfect.  Your definition of absolute, conditional, or perfect will absolutely be different from mine in some way just because we are different people having our own particular background.  Some people expect you and I to be perfect.  It may be a spouse, a child, a parent, a boss, a teacher, or even a friend; but perfection by their definition is expected.  Expectations are simply spoken or unspoken biases that shape how we see and interact with life.  My biases are going to be different from yours.  Your biases may be right or mine might be right.  They may even be right in both circumstances just because they are endemic to us.  Our biases have been and will continue to be formed by our engagement in life.  If we engage life as God wants, those biases are his biases and we do well to accept them.  However, liking to play god, we develop biases of our own learned out of dysfunction and misunderstanding our world and God's world. 
     Here is where the proverbial rubber meets the road.  We absolutely have free choice.  We can choose to not pay taxes.  Taxes will still be there but the absolute nature of how they are applied to me is altered.  We also have the absolute right to choose what happens to us when we die and not if we die.  We have two choices regarding our own death.  The first is to choose heaven and the second is to choose hell.  Be keenly aware that this becomes an eternal absolute choice after the absolute episode called "death" takes place.  It is unalterable after we physically die.  That is an absolute truth.  So, are out choices absolute?  Yes.  Do our choices have absolute consequences?  Yes, they do.  Do the choices we make have absolute effects on those around us?  Yes, for the most part.  The empathy and energy people put into relationships determine whether they care about or choices or they couldn't care less.  Finally, we like to think we hold some sway over those who are involved in our lives.  We even like to think we can get even God to see our side of the issues and have Him too change.  God cannot change...absolutely!
     From the moment we are conceived there are absolute truths that are in our lives.  We absolutely will pay taxes.  We will absolutely live a life with choices about everything.  We will absolutely have the consequences (positive and negative) that come with our choices.  We absolutely have the freedom of choice whether or not we choose to give our lives to Jesus.  We absolutely have the right to retain those parts of our past lives whether they are healthy to us or not.  The smallest of choices have absolute affects on that moment and then through time itself.  That mustard seed of faith can and will move mountains if we choose to believe. Our faith makes it possible for others to "see" Jesus and make that life saving and changing decision regarding Jesus.  We are left with the choice of letting Jesus live his life through us or not.  Both choices are absolutely ours.  What kinds of choices are you battling and have yet to see that without Jesus those choices are futile? 

Please, thank you and you are welcome.

     Growing up I was instructed to use these 3 words or phrases liberally.  Please, thank you and you are welcome were and are words and phrases that command respect.  The prevalence of children and adults who don't use these simple words and phrases is growing.  When prompted to utter one of these choices their speaking the words are hollow and often meaningless.  Why is that?  What has happened that we no longer have the respect enough to say please, thank you and you are welcome?  Recently I suggested someone tell another person thanks for something done for them.  Their response was, "They know I am thankful."  How do they know?  If we don't utter the words then what is it the receiver "knows"?  Besides the words, there is the body language accompanying the words that speaks volumes of what we really think.  Uttering assumptions like the one just stated is disrespectful and fake. 
     This reminds me of an old Swedish story of an old married couple.  The wife had come to the pastor of their church and said she was going to divorce her husband after their 30 plus years of marriage.  The pastor asked her why and she said that he no longer told her that he loved her.  So, the pastor went to visit the husband and asked him about his wife's accusing him of not telling her that he loved her.  The husband told the pastor that he did love his wife.  The pastor asked him why he didn't tell her that he loved her.  The husband replied, "I told her I loved her when I married her.  If anything changes I'll let her know."  While we may chuckle at the story the message is important to take to heart.  We have needs and we have wants as I am sure you will agree.  One of those needs is to hear the affirmation that we love and are loved by each other.  There isn't much difference with please, thank you, and you are welcome.
     In saying all of this I am simply saying that we need to be careful to not take advantage of others whom we think should understand what is not said as having been said.  The first commandment with a promise says that we should honor our father and mother.  The promise follows and says that if we do so we will live long and prosper.  I think God has a good idea here.  We should not only show respect but we should understand the positive and negative consequences of our choices regarding what we do and do not say.  The phrase, "I raised you better than that?" echoes through my mind having heard it said so often from parent to child in the crowds of people I have interacted with.  God is saying the same thing to us.  He raised us better than we are acting.  When we don't do what is right, (James 4:17 tells us) we sin.  Plain and simple.  If we know the good we are to be doing and saying and we don't do it or say it, we sin.  Sin, has it's consequences.  One of which is the demise of our credibility.
     When my children were young I would have to intervene when they fought or tormented each other.  I would tell the offender that they needed to say they were sorry.  They would respond with a sarcastic "Sorry!".  I would tell the offended child to say they forgave their sibling.  They would respond with a clipped, "Forgive you."  Neither child really meant what they were saying.  This is all part of the "raise a child in the way they should go and when they are old the will not depart from it." teaching of the Bible.  We are to raise children who are respectful, honoring and who will have a long and productive life.  I don't know anywhere in the world where respect and honor were garnered when someone failed to say please, thank you, and you are welcome.  I have found the opposite to be true.  This envelopes our spiritual life as well as our earthly life.
     Please understand the importance of the word God has spoken to each of us.  Thank you for reading my thoughts on the subject.  You are welcome to share this with everyone you know.  It's that easy.  Jesus said, "Go now and be my disciples."  That's up to you.

Celebrations should be good.

     It's my 62nd birthday today.  I know that I'm fortunate to have a 62nd birthday as so many don't get to have life so long.  In February I had a heart attack followed by open heart surgery and now recovery.  While I'm doing great (according to my doctor), there is a long road ahead of me.  Three months ago I had surgery.  In the past three months I have been reflecting on my past birthdays and how they were celebrated (or not).  While most of my birthdays were memorable there are a few that stick out as special.  One in particular I'd like to tell you about.  The age and such isn't important.  The elements that made up the day were.  I had been at work and thinking about what aspects of birthdays were important.  This was a celebration of my life and I felt I should and could celebrate my birthday the way I wanted.  So, on the way home I stopped at a store and purchased some gifts.  I also stopped at an elderly neighbors home on the way home.  The gift I gave him was to come and take care of his neglected lawns (about a third acre) for him for free.  He was dumbfounded and couldn't believe that I would do this for free.  It took me two days to complete the task.  In the end, we were both blessed.
     Back to my actual birthday.  Upon my arrival at home I was greeted at the door by my 4 young children, their mother and a step daughter.  I had them all gather in the living room and presented them with birthday cards and birthday presents to open.  The young kids were ecstatic and tore into their presents.  Their mother was a bit less thrilled and like her daughter was wondering what was going on and why was I giving presents. I told them that it was my birthday and I could give a lot easier than receive birthday presents.  Celebrations don't have to be the "old way" or the "traditional" way.  The celebrations of birthdays, Christmas' and such are without surprise, without newness, and certainly without the intimacy of relationship for the most part.  I wanted to have that intimacy of relationship as my gift both to give and to receive.  My neighbor and I remained close but after I mowed his lawn his son was embarrassed and began to mow the lawn.  My kids were young and don't remember much about the year dad gave birthday presents on his birthday.  Their mother probably still thinks I was crazy. 
     We have been given life and another day.  We aren't guaranteed another day and sometimes not even that next hour.  Life is precious and should be celebrated every moment of every day.  That doesn't mean we are selfish but rather that we are selfless.  Our focus should be on blessing those around us on a daily if not minute by minute basis.  It's these blessings that we give and receive that create the intimacy between people.  That applies to your family, friends and even enemies.  Blessing others rather than cursing others is what Jesus taught us to do.  Jesus was all about giving.  He gave sight, health, wine, life, and freedom to name a few.  He gave freely and didn't expect others to be obligated to him for what he did give.  Jesus was selfless.  He gave the gift of his love and then gave the gift of life through his own death and resurrection.  What a birthday gift!  When we choose to accept Jesus as our Lord and Savior there is (according to the Bible) a celebration and much rejoicing in heaven amongst the angels.  We are given life!  We were once dead and then given life through the death of One. 
     Today is my birthday.  My kids, relatives, and wife will be with me and we will celebrate another day of life.  First in Christ and then in the intimate relationship with others.  We will all leave the celebration richer than when we arrived.  The celebration is important because it almost didn't happen.  I almost went home.  Except for the grace of God and medical wonders I would be in heaven right now.  We don't have a guarantee of time with our kids, spouses, relatives, friends or even our enemies.  Celebrating life every day is the only way we can say that we have reflected Christ to those in our world.  I'm sure I will receive gifts and they will be given from the heart.  I pray that they will go home with the gift from me as well.  Blessings to them and to you on this, my birthday.  Happy birthday to you!

What we need versus what we want.

     Wanting and needing are two very different expressions of the human race.  All people of the planet earth fall into both of these expressions daily.  I need to breath because I want to live.  I need to eat because I want to live.  I need relationships because I want community.  You can make some of your own list but I think you get the drift.  We are a people who have need that are both valid and necessary.  We are also a people who have wants.  I want a burger and fries.  I want a new car.  I want to travel.  I want to win the lottery.  Both the "I need..." and the "I want..." are selfish in nature being both good and not so good.  It's good that we need love and it's definitely a need.  It's good that we want love and it is not necessarily a good thing.  Finding the need for love and taking advantage of wanting love reap different rewards.  One leads to fulfillment and contentedness while the other leads to a cavernous hole that is never satisfied.  Yet, we continue to not take what we need replacing that with what we want. 
     I want to understand my wants so that I can determine if they are really necessary for my life.  God says that he would give us the desires of our hearts.  Which heart?  The selfish one that brings good or the selfish one that brings the not so good?  God doesn't control us like some puppet on a string.  He has given us free will so that we can make decisions for our own lives, our own choices and our own consequences.  Neither does God keep us from indulging in our wants and seeking what we feel is good for ourselves.  Even though the want may not be harmful to my relationships with God or man; there are times when my wants simply are selfish.
     God doesn't need anything from me.  He wants a relationship with me.  God doesn't want to control me.  He needs me to love him and rely on him.  God doesn't need me to be productive but does want me to be productive.  When we think in terms of service God needs and wants us to be in service to him and our fellow mankind.  God wants ALL of mankind to accept Jesus as Lord and Savior of their lives.  God wants ALL to love him and to love all of mankind.  These are not needs for him but should be needs for us.  I find myself pondering whether he/she will be in heaven with me or if they will spend eternity in hell.  Both choices give eternal life.  Which one we choose is totally up to us.  When we consider our wants and needs in light of our Christian commitment to God where do those around us register?  Are their souls a want or a need?  Do you want your family, friends and even enemies to spend eternity in heaven or hell?  The need here is to serve God in such a way that your family, friends and enemies seek God themselves for their need of salvation.
     My dogs need to be fed and are fed twice a day with some snacks in between.  This is there need along with water and petting.  Okay, maybe the petting is a want.  My environment needs me to attend to it's wants.  My garden, for instance, wants me to eliminate the weeds but doesn't necessarily need to have them gone in order to produce.  Unpruned fruit trees still produce fruit.  Long lawns won't harm anyone.  Dandelions need to be done away with.  You see in these examples the minor side of choosing between need and wants.  I want a great garden so I need to weed.  I want a great orchard so I need to prune the trees.  I want my lawn to look great so I need to mow and get rid of weeds.  I want my life to be pleasing to God so I need to read the word, pray and do what he tells me to do.  You see, in the end, it's all about my choice and why I am choosing as I do.  It's the same for you and the rest of mankind as well.  It's always my choice.

My dogs are funny!

     I have 2 dogs.  Buddy is a large 125 pound mix of German Shepard, Akita, and Yellow Lab.  Henry is a medium sized 50 pound Blue Heeler.  They are both 12 going on 13.  While they have many attributes that are the same; they also have attributes that make them very different.  Buddy is our "watcher" while Henry is our "herder."  Buddy is our first dog.  He was a rescue dog and is afraid of the water and won't go into a bathroom.  When we first acquired him we were amazed at his energy as he bounced off the walls and drove us nuts.  Henry is our third dog.  He was being replaced with a baby so the people sold him to us.  Henry replaced our Cocoa who was a Husky.  They have been with us a very long time and have trained us to their pleasures.  How did that happen?  Buddy has become an old man who demands his schedule be met at the same time every day.  He also has the habit of laying down in such a way that you cannot go past him without either making him move or going over him.  Henry too has his quirks.  He is like Velcro!  Wherever you are; there he is.  It's not enough to be in the same room but he has to be right beside you or in your lap.  Yeah, I know, a 50 pound lap dog!
     I'm no different.  Except for the lap dog thing.  I am set in my ways and my day has "markers" to show that I'm on track, doing what I'm supposed to do and what's next.  Should my day be interrupted, I'm thrown for a loop.  Getting back on track can prove rather challenging.  It would seem that Murphy lives with me.  Not in the same city or neighborhood, but right there beside me.  It's become such a common event that I actually laugh at Murphy and his tricks.  I know what I need to do and for the most part do just that.  Whenever Murphy throws a wrench in the works, I sigh, maybe say a few words or at least think them, and resign myself to deal with the ramifications of the event.  When I look at Scripture and see that life is just what Jesus said it would be, my tolerance for Murphy or other things don't bother me as much.  Jesus said that we would be aliens in this world as Heaven was our home.  He also said that we would be in opposition to the world we live in and among the people who live with us.  We are told to have a life that so shows the world Jesus and doesn't show the world Steve.  I'm afraid I haven't been so good at that all the time.  However, I have moments when everything clicks.  When that happens, peace settles on me and life is good.
     My dogs sense the changes in my moods and react accordingly.  I tend to go to bed about 9 in the evening.  Whenever I go to bed later they become agitated.  Why?  Because after I go to bed my wife shares her night time popcorn with them!  The popcorn doesn't come into play until after I leave the room.  When I leave the room they yelp and bark, dance around and generally say, "Thank God he's gone!"  I'm glad my wife doesn't say that.  My dogs are funny.  Henry tends to get into trouble from time to time.  He tries to please us but there are certain times when temptation gets the best of him.  Hmmm...sounds like me!  When I discover the "event" I can always find Henry head down, tail not wagging, and looks of "I'm sorry." written all over his face.  Sometimes he has that look when I haven't had the opportunity to discover the misdeed first.  Then I go and search for the misdeed.  God does this with me in much the same way.  Though he knows my life intimately from before I was conceived until forever; he waits for me to be honest about my choices.  He waits patiently for me to confess and ask for forgiveness.  Then he pats me on the head and we move on with life. 
     My dogs and I don't know why God created cats other than to be chased.  Perhaps that is their place in life?!  Squirrels, rabbits, deer, birds, and other living creatures are chased more for fun than for food or danger.  I don't think either of my dogs are capable of protecting us from actual live threats.  Buddy would probably open the door for the burglar and Henry would ask the burglar if he could do anything for him.  So, we lock our doors when we are gone.  We know that they will not do what we would like them to do.  God does the same thing.  He knows we are unable to live sin free and so he makes a way out.  He tells us that he makes every day new.  He tells us that he forgives us our sins and remembers them no more.  God always makes a way for us to be in his good grace.  How wonderful is that?!  We love our dogs and encourage them to have a good relationship with us.  That means that even when they do something that is funny we look beyond the act and love them for who they are.  That doesn't mean we don't let them have their consequences.  We are there before, during and after the event.  Just like Jesus.  We must be so funny to God sometimes!

Things that just don't make sense!

     Eight hotdogs to a package and 12 hotdog buns to a package.  What do I do with the extra 4 hotdog buns?  Speedometers that go to 160 and a 60 mph speed limit.  Really need some open road if they go that fast!  Doing the same thing time after time with the same results!  I've done this one a few times too many.  That's part of what life is about.  Making sense of the insensible is something that you either choose to do or not.  If you don't choose to make sense of the insensible, you choose to stay stuck in life.  Either that or you really don't care about the insensible.  There is this overlap into Christianity as well.  It's not that Christianity is confusing as much as Christianity asks us to examine ourselves, our choices and what we want from our lives in the here and now as well as the future. 
     I'm not saying that the Christian doesn't encounter the insensible.  I'm not saying that magically all the crazy stuff we encounter or participate in is made sensible to us.  Neither am I saying that we are supposed to dive into a deep conversation about all the nuisances of life and what to do about them.  It would be nice to have all of the answers so that things did make sense.  That's not going to happen.  Nor should it.  That sense of mystery or the unknown is part of what draws us deeper into who we are, who God is, and what we are supposed to be and do for Him.  The Bible tells us that God will never ask us to engage something he won't keep us safe with.  God further says that he will always make a way out so we can exit the situation should the desire or need to do so comes up.  With that being said, we should look at what is insensible and at least try to make sense of whatever that is.  Part of the process is found to aid others in their journey.
     Anyone who has been around a child or has a child (small) knows all to well the "Why?" questioning that goes on followed closely with "Are we there yet?"  It's interesting to hear a child at a very young age being able to say "No!" and know what that means.  Our estimation of what children hear, see or experience and understand is way lower than it should be.  We laugh at some of the things children say and cry at some of the things children say.  Wishing to help our children has as easy a life as possible; many a parent has erred on the side of not explaining, not exploring and not encouraging a child to have an understanding of the un-understandable (like that word?).  It kind of makes sense.  What we don't have explanations for often are the most important parts of peoples lives.  Even more so for the child or children you and I are around.
     Going through the event of the death of a pet is difficult even for the adult.  Living with the death of someone who is taken before they grow old is difficult for pretty much everyone.  Looking at and dealing with disabilities and why they happened is as old as the Bible.  When people look on someone with a disfiguration or a disability, or a severe loss (like the death of a child) fear surfaces and most do nothing.  Wrong choice.  Just because we don't understand or comprehend that situation or person, we are not relieved of our duty to make sense of the insensible.  Our children, friends and families need to have answers even if it's only, "I don't know."  Looking to make sense of the insensible is difficult.  It is not impossible.  We may not know the answer today, tomorrow or any other day; but we will know the answer when we get to heaven.  Then it will no longer matter to us.  It will matter to those we leave behind.  Should we neglect to share our faith and understanding of God we neglect the very souls of those we love and care about. 
     What do you do when the insensible is visited upon you?  

Don't be de-feeted.

     Nope, this isn't a category on Jeopardy.  It would probably make a good category with all that could be taken from the play on words.  I've encountered many different feet, foot and feat problems in my life.  Some are self imposed while others have been given to me through different means.  They are both positive and negative in nature and don't affect just me and my world.  Just when my life seems to be settling down and feeling comfortable I am rocked out of my complacency with either a challenge to do something or to deal with something.  With such a life I am far from boring and often wish there were less issues in my life on the negative side.
     We tend to take out body parts for granted.  We do this without waking in the morning and saying, "Today I am going to hurt my foot."  None of us intend to participate in negative nor invite negative to happen in our day to day living.  I've been on crutches (physically and mentally) more times than I like to think over my 61 years of life.  My injuries have been both minor and major to the point where I needed surgery on one foot in order to continue walking.  It would seem that applies to most of us.  I'm not one to be slowed down and here I was slowed down by injuries.  Is this God's way of getting my attention and slowing me down?  Perhaps. 
     My walk in life and my walk in Christ both require that I step on solid ground.  I had several trees removed from my property.  They were huge trees that, when felled, left some ruts and holes in the lawn.  So, when I walk over the lawn I need to be careful where I step.  Sometimes I don't look where I'm going and I fall to the ground.  The ground we walk in our Christian life is the same.  It is filled with pits, ruts, holes and some are hidden from view.  I've fallen from walking without looking at the pitfalls that lie in plain view.  It's not always the hidden that trip us up.  The Word tells us that the Devil and his minions roam the earth seeking those of us who they can then devour.  He is a pitfall disguised as many different elements in our world.
     What is ironic about my tripping and falling on my lawn is that is just where God can best protect me...on my hands and knees.  Bringing me down is actually a means to lift me up.  The fall reminds me that I need Him to lift me up.  The lifting up by God is the reminder that he will always be there for me despite what Satan throws my way.  When Jesus had died on the cross Satan thought he had won.  He didn't know that the Son would soon be risen from death.  When I fall Satan thinks he has won.  He didn't know that the Son was risen so that I may also be risen from the fall.  This is the message throughout the Bible.  Fallen man sought by a loving God who wishes to give us life.
     There needs to be a way for our feet to do the walk and stay connected with God.  Ecclesiastics tells us in Chapter 3 that a cord of three strands is not easily broken and that if one has someone to walk alongside the ability to stay on our feet will be easier.  This begs us to have community among believers to the exclusion of the world of non-believers.  When we have the wisdom and strength from God (three strands of a rope Father, Son and Holy Spirit) coupled with the community of believers we have the best of situations while on earth.  It's then that we can truly help each other out of the holes and onto solid ground.  The feat of praying and standing on the Word is essential for me.  It should be for you as well.  Don't be defeated or de-feeted.

Waiting isn't my strong suit.

     I had to wait 30 seconds for my email to leave the computer the other day.  During that time I could have cooked dinner for a crowd of 20...or so it seemed.  My expectations have risen along with technology.  Hence, when I have a computer that is fast, an internet line that is fast, and I can write fast, I expect everything to be completed fast.  Because we have an instant society, the expectations of speed, quality and ease has risen to astronomical levels.  Instant messaging, instant oatmeal, instant music, instant this and instant that.  We live for the instant.  Taking the Christian in me to task, there are things I don't want instantly.  I don't want to be convicted of my sin instantly.  I don't want to wait for vengeance or for my wants and needs to be taken care of.  I don't want to be told by God to "Wait."  Waiting seems to be all around us though.  Anyone who has traveled through a major airport recently know all to well the long lines of people with items in hand waiting in the line for their cue to go to the next available screener.  By the time you get to your plane you no longer want to wait for anything.
     The second problem I have is that I can't seem to be okay with the "time" spent waiting when I could be doing something else.  Multi-tasking has become an obsession with not only me but most of the world around me.  I'm not talking about pointless multi-tasking.  I'm talking about washing the dishes while the laundry is being done and cooking dinner is taking place multi-tasking.  Don't forget taking care of all the needs of the kids!  There is a belief that those who do lots are capable of doing more and that those who are not capable of doing lots are not capable of doing more.  Waiting for both groups is much different.  For the multi-tasking person, waiting is frustrating and non-productive.  For the non-multi-tasking person, waiting is just another function of life.  It would seem that we have an epidemic of people who are waiting.  It's received a negative connotation because we associate waiting with doing nothing.  If someone does nothing then their worth in society has decreased.  The other focus is that of the ones who don't like waiting.  Their abilities are sharpened with every new circumstances that they encounter.  Rising to the challenge is good for us!
     When God wants us to wait we should wait.  Instead, I return to my will and find something to do.  Time is important and shouldn't be wasted after all.  It's possible with modern technology to do amazing things in amazing amounts of time.  I've been waiting for 11 years to culminate a process regarding my disability status.  Today is the day when I will give my final disposition and then I will have to wait for an answer.  Not knowing makes waiting even more intense for me.  It's like going to the ER and waiting for a friend or relative who is being seen.  Time seems to slow to a crawl or even stop with nothing being instant except the billing of their insurance provider.  I've gone to church services where people were dropping like flies due to the dull sermon being preached in a church that is to warm and a pastor who has bored everyone to the point of they passing out.  Waiting for that service to end is excruciating!  When we turn our lives over to God we include that part of where we wait.  Why does He want us to wait?  When we are impatient we want to have things taken care of now ad not 11 years later.  His perfect timing is very important in that he is busy weaving together a tapestry of people's lives intertwining and working just as he thinks they should. 
     So, I'll wait on God for his instruction in my life.  Then when I hear from God, I'll wait for him to say "go."  When I'm on my way, I'll slow down and wait or the step by step he is willing to use to lead us to his purpose in our lives.  Jesus has been so patient with me as an example of how we are to be patient with others.  What about you?  Do you have problems with waiting? 

When I feel sorry for myself.

     As a Christian there is an expectation that I won't feel sorry for myself and have a cheery smile on my face in spite of what life throws at me.  I've been told as much by others.  Perhaps you have too.  When someone feels sorry for themselves there is a shift in their being that can only seek to drive a wedge between my God and I.  That's the example put in the Bible (both Old and New Testaments).  It's easier to try and find someone that at some point DIDN'T feel sorry for themselves.  We are a people steeped in complaining.  I don't pretend that will ever really stop until we are in God's presence in Heaven.  The phrase "Heaven on earth." takes on a bit of life at this juncture of my blog.  People speak of wanting heaven on earth like it's something bought at the corner store.  Heaven is a very real place where we go when our physical bodies give out.  There will be no feeling sorry for myself there.  In heaven we will have no pain, no fears, no failures, no reminders that in comparison to so and so we are lesser.  What we will have is peace. 
     With my recent heart attack and subsequent open heart surgery some would say I was justified with feeling sorry for myself.  I know there were patients around me who did.  I was thankful that yet one more day I could draw a breath of air here on earth.  The opposite would have been acceptable and yet, I didn't feel like I was finished here on earth.  So what did I go and do?  I began to feel sorry for myself.  It didn't start that way.  I began to ask questions.  Questions that revealed problems I hadn't been aware of and problems I was aware of but disregarded.  As the answers to these questions came I began to assign blame.  For being in the hospital gives a person a LOT of time to think and dwell on issues and events.  Anger began to rise at health care providers who took my symptoms and misdiagnosed resulting in my eventual heart attack.  Then there was he anger over the DNA aspect.  Thanks to my father and grandfather I was set up to have a heart attack.  Finally, there was the anger at myself for letting myself go to where I was in this hospital ER in the first place.  So, when I was in the midst of this I began to feel sorry for myself.  That ushers in a downward spiral that is difficult to stop if you are really enjoying the benefits of the attitude.
     My "heaven on earth" became even more elusive to me.  Yes, I can imagine it.  No, I can't seem to manufacture it.  Too bad.  That's just the way it is.  The real culprit in taking me to this place of feeling sorry for myself really has it's center in my selfishness.  Selfishness is nothing more than self love above the love of God.  So I exercised my rights to be in a position where I felt sorry for myself.  People expressed prayers and love towards me and I'm getting much better.  Yet, feeling sorry didn't take me anywhere.  Heaven on earth seemed as elusive as ever.  Maybe you have felt that way from time to time.  Maybe your heaven on earth seems to far out of grasp to care.  So, you to, have taken to feeling sorry for yourself.  In so doing, we do the comparison thing.  I have it worse than so and so.  my situation is different and no one understands.  Why can't they see how we need sympathy?  Enough of that! 
     Feeling sorry for myself halts the journey.  The pause button gets pushed and the show stops.  The worst part?  No one can fix this situation except me.  I created it and I need to fix it.  Just saying I won't feel sorry for myself is a great step but doesn't remove the problem.  Pretending that the issue has gone away or somehow just disappeared doesn't work either.  What works is for us to see ourselves as God sees us.  He sees Christians as free from sin.  His vision for us is of success and happiness.  He wants us prepared to enjoy Heaven when we leave heaven on earth.  In order for this to take place I need to take my eyes off myself in order that He may be seen and listened to.  Feeling sorry for myself separates me from the love of God.  It does for you too.  Heaven on earth is contented living with faith that God will take us to our ultimate goal...life with Him.

Sometimes you just neet to risk it all.

     Life is about risk.  Either you avoid it, am ambivalent about it, or chase it like crazy.  I've done all three from time to time.  All the choices have their place and time in our lives.  Risk isn't about choice.  We have no choice but to encounter risk every day of our lives.  What we do and how we do with risk is where positive consequences and negative consequences are dealt out in our lives and the lives of those around us.  The Bible is full of men and women (children too) who actively engaged risk from God's standpoint.  If the saints of the past can and did live in risk, then so can you and I.  That doesn't mean that the choices and end results won't be hard to deal with.  Where some risk is easy, other risk is difficult.  With the latter we sometimes find ourselves in the position of questioning the wisdom of risk.  Maybe you, like me, have been tempted (and even did) to quit.  The cost seemed to high, the outcome wasn't visible, or perhaps pressure from others impacted you and we quit.
     In order to quit something, you must first begin that something.  Risk is that way as well.  We are trained as children to take risks or to avoid them.  Depending on your family dynamics you either lived in one of the three categories of risk listed above.  Raised by a pastor?  Your risk may be minimum.  Raised by an accountant you may not even register as taking risks.  Raised by a police officer or fireman and your need for risk is great.  These are generalities and not necessarily applicable to all professions.  There is something, though, that marks our conscious and unconscious during our growing up that predestines us to deal with risk as it surfaces in our lives.  For instance, how many parents have yelled at their kids to not run into the street or parking lot? I cannot even remember how many times I have told my kids to be careful over the years.  Okay, I still tell my adult children and grandchildren to be careful.  Did Mary tell Jesus to be careful?  I believe that she did and rightfully so.
     The biggest risk in our lives doesn't come from getting in the car and on the freeway or asking our boss for a pay raise.  The most overwhelming risk isn't about whether we get that surgery or are waiting for that person we love to return from surgery.  It's not even when our kids walk to school for the first time or go on their first solo car drive.  The biggest risk of our lives is also the most important risk we will contemplate...ever.  Just what we need for this risk to be engaged is first and foremost knowledge and insight, second contemplation of the facts and feelings and third, a decision that will ultimately change our lives forever.  I'm talking about becoming a Christian.  EVERYTHING is at risk.  Our lives are woven together with a fabric that includes our friends, family, job and co-workers, and every other facet of our life.  Everything in and around our lives is changed with our decision regarding risk.  Even if we choose to do nothing there are ramifications of that choice and those areas of our lives are still changed. 
     When we try a new food, we risk. When we stand up for ourselves, we risk.  When we drive on the freeway, we risk.  There is always risk involved in any action in our lives be they positive or negative.  With the choice to become Christian the risk is multiplied as we apply the Gospel to our lives.  Our changed lives will bring up questions.  we will have some of those in our lives leave us while others become closer.  Our life example to our children, spouse, other relatives and friends as well as our workplace will be forever based upon a new set of morals and priorities.  Christ will be speaking through us and the Holy Spirit will be living in us.  God the Father will sustain us and together we will face the daily risk that our world presents.  In the end times there will be a time when our faith will endanger our lives and the lives of those we care about.  Was the risk of making the choice to follow Jesus worth it?  Yes, and more!
     Today you and I will face risks.  Some small and others large.  It's not that we have risk in our lives; but rather, it's about us choosing to engage that risk on whatever level it's presented to us.  What will your response to risk be today?

A complicated life

     Whenever I think about the complexities of my life or the lives of those close to me; I remember Michael Keaton as Batman trying to tell his girlfriend that he is Batman.  He stutters and stammers after much avoidance and finally says, "My life is complicated." or something similar.  Could just as well been you or I.  Life is complicated and sometimes very difficult to believe much less explain.  What we see on the outside often doesn't reflect what is on the inside.  The inside is so diverse in nature that sometimes we find it hard to explain much less vocalize to others.  When we consider the added elements of our lives the picture becomes even more crowded.  Please understand that most of my life is complicated because of thoughts and actions I have actively participated in or pursued.  When anyone tells me their lives are uncomplicated my first reactions is, "Yeah, right!"  Should we just consider the secrets we have and haven't shared we could see that life is complicated.
    James was the head of the Christian church first century in Jerusalem.  He was the half brother of Jesus.  When we consider that James was the younger brother of God we can be overwhelmed with what James must have felt like when he was little.  "Why can't you be  more like your brother?"  It must have been very difficult for James and his siblings to hear that Jesus was not only their older brother but that he was a half brother who's father was THE Father God of the universe.  Then to be asked to acknowledge that Jesus was God and ask him to be his Savior was the capstone to the complicated life of James.  How could he explain to his classmates that his big brother was God.  What could you expect when people laughed and humiliated him when he claimed Jesus as Savior?  Your life and mine may be complex but James life, though complex, was one of clear dedication to the Son of God first and foremost. 
     I tell people that I live my life in a state of positive discontent.  They look at me funny so I explain.  I'm happy for where I am but long for where I need to be.  I'm positively discontent with my current status and place in life.  Long term I long to be home with Christ where I will forever be content.  However, while here on earth I am discontented.  Life is complicated partly because I am an alien here; a sojourner passing through to a better place.  My life is full of history as is every one's.  My story is less complicated than some and more complicated than others.  The areas of my life that are uncomplicated are the ones where Jesus has control surrendered by me.  The complicated ones are where I'm still growing and haven't given up control to one degree or another.   My thought process is made more complex when I have multiple things going on at the same time.  I have deficits that add to the complexity of life.  So do you.  That's where God comes in.
    God sees and knows everything about me.  He asks me to accept me as His creation.  He cannot make mistakes and thus I am not a mistake.  Neither are you.  Think about that for a moment.  You are not a mistake.  Fat or thin, tall or short, red hair and freckles or no hair at all; you are just the way God intended you to be.  The Bible says that we were put together in our mother's womb by the will and hand of God who knew you before you were conceived.  Begins to make my head spin at the complexity of God's creation.  Ultimately you and I need to accept the simple and clear love of God which is uncomplicated in this complicated world we live in.  While we may not have the difficulty of growing up as James with the Savior of the world; we most certainly have complexities that have formed and exposed who we are. 
     Bottom line:  I am a sinner who was in need and still is in need of the grace of God while I struggle to see myself as God sees me.  I am saved by the grace of God who in a complex way set about to bring forgiveness of sin to all of mankind should they ask.  Not only past sin, but present and future sin as well.  People who do not know Jesus see the concept of Christianity as complex and hard to understand much less incorporate into their lives.  The complexity of God is revealed to those who seek him.  When we are enlightened the complexity turns to simplicity.  Now if I could only settle these other areas of my life.  I know that I need to stop making changes harder than they are.  My choices are to choose Him who gave his life for mine.  It's complex.

There are some things that just don't make sense...even to me.

     There are so many "Why?" questions in my world that sometimes I feel like I'm drowning in the sea of no answers.  Ever felt that way?  It's not that I need any or all of the answers but I want the answers.  Sometimes I even think that it's my right to have the answers.  What do we do when not only is society is silent but it seems God is also?  I question children dying for most any reason.  I question the good someone does being repaid with evil.  I question the dilemmas posed between Scripture and what is going on in the world.  There are so many situations and questions that just don't make sense.  I've categorized myself as a fairly intelligent and open minded for the most part.  Though some would agree and say the exact opposite; it's my place to feel as I do.  That doesn't make sense to some either.  So, if these "things", "questions", or "situations" don't make sense to you or I, do they make sense to God?
     The short answer is "Yes."  The long answer is that we cannot surprise God and yet we can try his patience, not listen to the answer, or not even acknowledge that He knows more and better than us.  It's nice that God has the answers to all of life's questions.  It's nice that he has a plan for you and I that includes peace, fulfilled needs, and love.  It's nice that others who know Him can speak into our lives when we just don't see the sense in something.  But, it's not "nice" that my heart desires.  It's answers to the questions, situations or things that take place in my life and the lives of those whom I love.  I have PTSD and don't know what my mind is thinking when it triggers the PTSD resulting in actions, words, or behaviors that people tell me don't make sense.  Trust me, they don't make sense to me either.  My baby died.  There is no sense in that.  At least none that I can see.  I'm fat.  Okay, I can see sense in why that is.  You get the picture though.  Sometimes we encounter things, questions and situations that just don't make sense...to us. 
     The Bible is full of verses that give us hope.  It's also full of verses that tell us to trust that what we are going through is only temporary.  When we read a verse that leaves us with no answer other than "because I said so." we become frustrated and our world is taken off track.  What we don't see is that the answer to the question may not be answered or the answer may be a long way down the track.  Many times events have occurred in my life where I was left wondering why they had happened to me.  I wonder less when these events happen to others.  You probably do also.  What is interesting is that I allow things, questions and situations to take my life off God's track.  When I am off track, my growth and ability to help myself and others decreases significantly.  In that state my life makes no sense when compared to my life when Christ is in control.  Why do I try to run my life my way when God said he would do the job for me?  It doesn't make sense.
     There are plenty of times I have said or heard other say, "I'll ask God when I get to heaven."  Maybe you have said that as well.  The truth is when we get to heaven we will no longer care about the things, questions and situations that presented themselves here on earth.  Our tears will be wiped away, there will be no more pain and suffering and there will be a dessert bar!  Okay, maybe not the dessert bar but that's a nice thought.  Sometimes God doesn't allow us to have answers because the answers would overwhelm us and work to destroy our faith.  Faith is believing in what we cannot see according to Paul in Hebrews.  When we cannot see the answers, we need to have faith that the world is certainly unfolding as it should.  At least my world and your world.  I can't use the same argument for the rest of the world.  The rest of the world doesn't make sense to me. Does this make sense?

Freedom is not free...even in Christ

     As we approach Memorial Day weekend we will be reminded over and over that freedoms we enjoy are not free at all.  In fact, there is nothing on earth that is free.  Heaven might be different but here on earth freedom costs in one way or another.  Freedoms are both corporate and individual.  You find them in the church and outside the church.  Someone else's freedom might not agree with your freedom.  Sometimes we cannot see the outward manifestation of freedom.  Sometimes that same freedom is right in front of our eyes and we still can't see it.  Conversely, we (by action and inaction) take away the freedoms others have in their lives.  Occasionally we have our freedoms taken away or impinged upon by those around us, our government or the world we live in.  What is freedom to you and why is it important?  How much does your need for "freedom" actually enslave you rather than set you free?  How much did your freedom cost?  That's what Memorial Day and the work of Christ on the cross are all about.  YOU were bought with a price.
     Paul exhorts us to be careful exercising our freedoms as they may cause others to stumble.  He suggests that we actually give up a freedom if that exercised freedom causes someone to stumble or to not engage Christ in their lives.  The first century church was the freedom from the enslaved religious so many sought.  Once free, there were many who flaunted their freedom.  That's not what Christ set us free to do.  Christ set us free to be slaves to the Gospel.  This is Paul's take on it.  Paul said that he "became all things to all people."  That's what Christ is to us and we should be to our world.  Let's not be so intent on taking away the splinter in someone else's eye without taking out the log in our own eyes first.  While we have the freedom to drink alcohol, we don't have the freedom to case another to stumble.  While we have the freedom to express our relationship with Christ to others, we don't have the freedom to demand that their religious expressions be the same as ours.  The freedom we seek must be the freedom we give. 
     Freedom personally messes with my mind.  I have so much freedom in America and yet find myself enslaved to so much.  There are people whom I have talked with that explain to me their freedom to worship but being enslaved by their church's expectations.  I have the freedom to express my faith in God but am enslaved by the laws prohibiting such expression of faith.  Enslaved by the "let's not offend" majority, the world is enslaved by each other.  While I have the freedom to write this blog there is also the responsibility to make sure that I'm basing all I write on what the Bible says.  My interpretations are not always spot on.  Yet, I have the freedom to make mistakes because Christ gave up his freedom to take my death upon himself.  Christ enslaved himself to my sin so that I could be saved.  My freedom from death and hell was paid with a price.  God gives us the freedom to choose and in our choices we are either set free for eternity in Heaven or set free for eternity in Hell.  Both choices we are free to make.
     Our choices of having the freedom we have is in itself necessary for our continued existence as an individual, family, group, nation and world.  When someone is enslaved by religion they are not free to have a relationship.  Relationships controlled or demanded are not relationships of freedom at all.  Try as you and I might, we are caught in the daily quandary of what to do with the freedom we discover we have.  We have the freedoms that so many in the world will never be able to fathom or engage.  Where we have the freedom to work; many choose not to do so.  Where we have the freedom to stand up and take a stand many choose not to do so.  Where we have the freedom to vote and participate in our world many choose not to do so.  Why is it we live in the greatest country in the world and yet we refuse to exercise our freedom?  When the Christian does this the message to the world around him or her is that we really aren't set free by Christ.  We may have salvation but we are still slaves to our sin.  What freedom have your experienced that needs to be engaged again?

Jesus and conservative socialism

     Ever had one of those moments in thought where you suddenly became aware of yet another area of your life which hadn't evolved past that which you were taught in grade school?  Me too!  Actually, in my head that happens more often than not.  I'm sure that when you read the title to today's blog you at least raised your eyebrows and maybe even said, "This should be good!"  You may have even said, "He's gone too far now."  Bear with me and perhaps we can see how our world has changed and so have we.  It's not a big jump in logic to see that we are not the people who formed this country.  Nor are we the people who made up the first century church.  We are, however, a people who have carried the same message since the creation of Adam and Eve.  That would be the message of individual community.  Just what does it mean to be involved in individual community?  For beginners we need to be conservative socialists. 
     When we look back on history every era and every people group had what they defined as their basic belief for all people.  Different slants on history aside, the understanding was that "their" discovery of "their truth" was used to shape "their world" as they saw it.  Previous generations would roll over in their graves to see what the current generation was now defining themselves as.  This is the repetition of history through the ages.  Today we can have instant access to more information than was ever thought possible.  Our smart phones kind of ruin a good game involving trivia.  We have accomplished two things with our "evolving".  The first is we have succeeded in becoming a people who are selfish and self centered.  Yes, I know it's true of every generation since Eve first ate of that fruit.  However, the reasoning for our selfish and self-centered existence has become something of a future focused event instead of being shaped by history.  We have arrived at a place where time has accelerated and continues to do so at a rapid rate.  Those who don't adapt are left behind.  That's okay though because we are no longer our brothers/sisters keepers.  The second evolution is our sense of being a victim and being victimized.  Our definitions have so evolved that nothing is our responsibility anymore.  It's all caused by the environment, the different classes, education, and of course race non-integration.  So, we are moving forward with a clear selfish agenda despite what anyone else wants because of the "common good."  And this, we are doing at the speed of technology.  We simply have left behind a huge portion of people both inside and outside of our churches. 
     From today's definition of conservatism we are able to still see the Bible as a conservative directive on how to live.  The ten commandments are still divided with 6 towards our fellow man and 4 towards God.  All 10 are focused on interaction and support of our fellow man.  They are in definition conservative standards that have existed since time began.  Okay, maybe a little longer than that.  Jesus came and lived amongst us teaching us these 10 commandments while redefining them into the 2 commandments.  Love God and love others.  Even today we still have a standard of what is acceptable and what is not to engage in and not be in conflict with God's commands.  Jesus was conservative and so we should be.  Jesus was also socialist as we understand the word today.  Jesus was all about us taking care of each other because God takes care of us.  We are to be imitators of Jesus and that means we acknowledge that we live differently.  We are to be conservative in all areas of our lives and we are to be socialist towards all people.  Both require us to confront whether or not we will obey the 10 or the 2 commandments.  Should we choose to not obey, we neither love God nor do we love people.  In that case, we love ourselves.
     When we survey the people around us we understand that they understand things differently than we do.  Getting past the definitions to the place of common ground is important to everyone.  That doesn't mean we live at the lowest common denominator.  Rather, it means we take the high road and love God and love people despite what the world says.  It means we abandon our selfishness and understand we are a part of something greater.  What it does NOT mean is that we are free to live a sinful life.  This does NOT mean we can't ignore the history being written that cannot be unwritten down the road.  We need to practice the life of Christ in all areas of our living.  That includes being a conservative socialist like Jesus.
    

Breaking away from the crowd

     We don't want to but sometimes we need to break away from the crowd.  Part of the process of breaking away from the crowd is easy and part is very difficult.  We, like most people, long to belong to the crowd.  We are a people who have an intact need to be with other people.  There is a sense of need for community deep inside of us.  We may have all the outward signs of wanting to be a hermit but deep inside God created us for community.  Community is both positive and negative both in history as well as our current time.  Community with God's people is supposed to be positive and yet sometimes is the exact opposite.  Community with the world is supposed to be negative to the Christian and yet is sometimes the exact opposite.  What do we run to and what do we run from is the real question. 
     We have been told through our teens that it's not always wise to follow the crowd...especially the "wrong" crowd.  Just what is the right or wrong crowd?  What may seem like a good crowd to me may well be a bad crowd to others. The truth we need to address isn't so much what makes up a good crowd or a bad crow but rather what we bring to the crowd we participate with.  Just what is it that I give to the crowd and take away from the crowd?  The purest in me wants to trumpet the positive and wonderful that I bring to the crowd.  However, I don't always bring the positive and sometimes bring too much of the negative.  Growing up in a small mid-western farming community I lived 12 miles outside the nearest town and my closest neighbor (my uncle) lived 2 miles away.  We had the pleasure of not being part of the crowd.  You see, when you aren't born and raised in a small town (ours was 300 people, 7 churches and 1 bar) you never belong.  Even today I don't feel any sense of belonging to that crowd.  I'm sure that some of you reading this can make the connection.  Sometimes we don't have any control over whether we are included in a crowd or not.  Sometimes we don't have any control over whether we are allowed to bring our talents and gifts to the group.
     Crowds of all kinds are manipulated by the world around them as well.  We who belong to a group have either a spoken or unspoken agenda that frames the very structure of our group.  You don't belong and you do.  You can maybe earn entrance but you will never be a full part of the group.  We may use you in the group but that doesn't mean we have to accept you.  What is it that God wants us to be/do as a group of believers?  I don't think he had any of this in mind when he was put out of the crowd on the cross.  Even the crowd (two others) with whom he was crucified were divided as to whether Jesus belonged or not.  They had it backwards even as we do today.  It's not that we choose to belong with Jesus; it's that Jesus has made a way for us to belong with him.  We need to be part of His crowd in order to be part of the community of believers.  The Bible tells us in Acts that the early believers had all things in common and worked for the good of the believers.  Why?  Because that was what Jesus taught them.
     Jesus has taught us to break away from the worlds crowds and to cling to the crowd of believers who will one day be the crowd who are brought together in heaven.  In order to be more fully part of the crowd of believers we need to understand why we belong to the groups that we do.  We, by nature, feel the need to be accepted by others according to the worlds standard.  Jesus says he will fill that need when we become part of his crowd simply by providing grace.  It's important that we understand we are to be in the world but not of the world.  Because we are a peculiar people and a holy people chosen by God, we have not only a great hope but also a great burden to bring others to the Savior who alone ushers his group into the presence of God.  The more we immerse ourselves in what the Christian is to be, the stronger the group.  Paul goes on to say that as individual parts of the body that no one in a group is anymore important than another person.  Our gifts are linked together in order to benefit the body of Christ. 
     Break away from the crowd of the world.  Break into the crowd of heaven.

I think, therefore I am messed up!

     The saying goes, "an addict alone with his/her own mind is in bad company."  It's true.  We don't like either thought.  We don't like to believe that we are addicts nor do we like to believe we are messed up.  It's true though.  This journey through life isn't about everyone else, history or the future.  This journey through life is about you.  It's about me.  It's about now,  It's about the quality of life we leave for others pleasure.  That doesn't mean that if you are a well educated or well traveled individual that you have left a quality of life others can find pleasure from.  In the end, they will look at you and I and either see Jesus or us.  If all they see is us, then we have really messed up.  If they see Jesus then they have seen the only important part of life.  We make the decision daily and sometimes don't even know it.  There are people who watch us all the time.  It may be that guy in the car beside us on the freeway, our mother-in-law, the child standing at our feet, or a friend who wants to be part of our lives.  They are there and they are watching to see if it's "us" or "Jesus" whom we profess to know and serve.
     Just what does my life look like? Is it the truth or is it a lie?  What would you do if for 24 hours every thought you had, regardless of where and when, was spoken out loud for everyone to hear?  People would hear what the don't see and see what they don't hear.  What would your response be to my question?  "Holy crap!" comes to my mind.  If the world around me can't see Jesus in me there probably is good reason.  My thoughts belie that reason.  So, if then, our thoughts were out loud would we be in a state of happiness or despair?  I don't have an answer for you but I would need to isolate for 24 hours!  No contact with human beings of any age, race or stature for 24 hours.  Still, I would be condemned by He who knows all of my thoughts...as messed up as they and I are.  When we go through our day God is standing right there with us.  He's riding in our cars and sitting next to us on the plane.  He is there in the room with us with whomever we are dining, talking, having a meeting or other activity.  Not as a voyeur but as a loving father who wants only the best for his child. 
     What would be your response if you were to read this blog tomorrow and all that was written was every thought I had for the previous 24 hours regardless of the nature of that thought?  Would you be indignant that this writer could possibly think thus?  Would you be ambivalent about the content because it's your content too?  Would you feel sad for me that I have such a weird mind?  Would you see Jesus?  Hmm... The best choice I can make every moment of every day is to not think.  Not be "myself".  The best choice I can make is to follow the Bible's command that I "take every thought captive" before it takes me captive.  You see, when we do the thinking our thoughts condemn us.  Our thoughts control us and take us captive.  We see ourselves as worthless sinner in a hopeless world where we are doomed every day we take a breath.  It's true.  Seldom do we really, deep down inside of our hearts and minds, do we think of ourselves as "more than conquerors" or "fighting the good fight." 
    So, the church then becomes nothing more (or less) than one big 12 step group where we share where we have found hope in help from God.  Should our thoughts be out loud in church we would need to be on our knees praying for not only ourselves but those around us.  The only choice is to claim Jesus' free gift of salvation (which we don't deserve) and to step aside in all aspects of our lives so that He is what our lives are all about.  It's only in this relationship that we can say that we "no longer live, but Christ lives within us."  Let Jesus think through you and you won't be messed up.  Listen to His voice and get used to His thinking and not your own.  Don't be messed up!