This quandary is implicit in living in this century. However, the practice of asking people to give up who they are has been going on since God's first creation decided to give up who they were to find out who someone else thought they might be. Satan did a fine tap dance on Adam and Eve's heads that resulted in the history of mankind fighting to retain who they think they are, thought they were or have an idea of who they want to be.
My son Benjamen was about 4 when we were sitting on the couch watching TV. He was tucked under my arm snuggling with me. I noticed that he was quiet and looked to see him in a very determined thinking mood. I waited. The question would come when it's time came. Then it hit and Benjamen said, "Dad?" with that tone that said "I have something to say and want you to listen." So, I replied, "Yes Benjamen?" He paused for a few more moments before he asked me this question: "Do you know what I want to do when I grow up?" Being a parent who loves his children I want them to be who God intends them to be. That discovery has to come over time and in their own minds. I told him that I didn't know and asked him to tell me. He said very deliberately and positively, "Everything." He wanted to do everything! I replied, "You can do everything! Whatever you want to do and be you can." We went back to watching TV and he was snuggling a bit closer.
Benjamen will graduate this June from high school. He's already been accepted into a good college of his choice and has plans for some travel before entering into classes and work. As has been the case over his lifetime I will be there to support him, offer advice when asked (and sometimes when not asked!), and to listen. My job as Dad should have been enough for him to find his way in life that reflects his Christian commitment as well as his desire to do "everything." There are people and organizations that will try to take that away from him. There are demands that the world has placed on people that cause many of us to cringe for our children. Benjamen, like his siblings, is very intelligent and gifted. Mining that intelligence and giftedness is a life long endeavor. It's a job he has to do. I cannot do it for him and neither can anyone else. It's his job. That is true for all of my kids and human beings in general.
When I was in my senior year of high school I couldn't wait to escape school and home. I had no idea of who I was but knew who I wasn't. Tired of people and social times trying to determine who I had to be I left. The unfortunate factor in my life was I didn't know who I truly was. Over the years I would make good decisions, bad decisions and sometimes no decisions at all. However, all of them uncovered a bit more of me. Besides those who would take away who I was discovering I was, there were those who would encourage me to become whom God designed me to be. Even today at 61 I can be heard saying, "You know what I want to do when I grow up? Everything!" The apple doesn't fall very far from the tree. Where "my generation" were told to graduate school, get a job, marry, have children and retire at 65 I never fit in. My life has seen 17 vocations. I loved most of them and learned from all of them. I have gone on to additional schooling and have 2 masters along with many credits towards a third one. I've written one book and published it. A second book is at the publisher. I've lost loved ones and enemies. I've discovered loved ones and enemies I never knew I had. Through all of this the greatest challenge has been to keep going.
Life's greatest task for me has been to preserve who I have discovered I am while looking for more of me. There continue to be many who try to take "me" away from me. So that battle rages on. I know it won't die until I do. Tenacity with integrity is valuable to all who desire to go forward where others try to hold them back. Knowing that we live life only once, I need to deal with my past failings and indeed leave them behind me. I don't know what your struggle today is. I pray that you will take heart that you too can do "everything" and not give up on you. Don't let anyone take away who you are. Be whom God designed you to be!
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